Linda Wisdom > Quotes

“Love shouldn't be binding, but freeing.”
― Linda Wisdom, 50 Ways to Hex Your Lover

“Fool witch once, shame on you. Fool witch twice, oozing sores and an eternal rash in private areas.”
― Linda Wisdom, 50 Ways to Hex Your Lover

“The last time I had PMS a roast chicken popped out of the oven and danced the Macarena.Krebs had walked in just as the chicken started dancing. By then he was pretty much used to anything and only asked if the chicken shouldn’t be doing the Chicken Dance instead.”
― Linda Wisdom, 50 Ways to Hex Your Lover

“Some things can’t be ignored. You can only conquer your past if you choose to face it.”
― Linda Wisdom, 50 Ways to Hex Your Lover

“We've survived the Black Plague, the Titanic, and Pearl Harbor just to name a few. Not to mention the Disco Period.”
― Linda Wisdom, 50 Ways to Hex Your Lover

“But I don’t wanna go to the grocery store!” Her forehead connected with the table’s surface. “It’s a mean nasty place with soccer moms blocking the aisles as they talk to their friends or on their cell phones, kids running and screaming all over the place.AndFred,theproduceguy,fondleshismelons 5o ways to hex your lover 45 while looking at mine. And I’m not allowed to zap any of them!” she moaned. “It’s so not fair!”
― Linda Wisdom, 50 Ways to Hex Your Lover

“No honking the horn or flashing the lights because you get bored,” she warned Irma. “Dweezil’s threatened to blow up the car if you throw a tantrum out here. He said you freak out the customers when you do that.”
“The man who looks like an olive claims I freak people out?” She gestured to a troll that exited the office. “Oh yes, I’m the odd one here.”
Jazz swallowed her laughter. The last thing she needed to do was encourage the irascible ghost.”
― Linda Wisdom, 50 Ways to Hex Your Lover

“If you would only be willing to take the time to truly get to know me. I know that we would spawn beautiful offspring together, my lovely Jazz.I could give you riches you can only imagine. I have much to offer a beauty like you.” She felt her smile tremble on her lips, then lost her hard-won control. “I would rather eat dead rotting flesh,” she replied, her disgust winning out over her fear of insulting him.
His eyes lit up at her words and bright-red gas literally crawled up his back making the dead fish scent of the wharves smell like French perfume. “You do not know my kind as well as you pretend to, my sexy Jazz. You just spoke of our most popular aphrodisiac.”
― Linda Wisdom, 50 Ways to Hex Your Lover

“...and a new dress because her asshole husband had bought an ugly funeral outfit she was stuck in for eternity”
― Linda Wisdom, 50 Ways to Hex Your Lover

“What did he do? Channel Vincent Price and transport the Tower of London'to the Hollywood Hills?”
― Linda Wisdom, 50 Ways to Hex Your Lover

“A bully is only a coward who needs to be shown who’s really in charge.”
― Linda Wisdom, Hex Appeal

“Who says a scorned man can’t feel just as much wrath as a scorned woman?”
― Linda Wisdom, Wicked by Any Other Name

“Women, and children, are to be cherished and respected, not terrorized.”
― Linda Wisdom, Hex in High Heels

“Sometimes we can change the direction of our lives, but sometimes we’re destined to follow the path we were given.”
― Linda Wisdom, Hex in High Heels

“The blinding colors on his tie resembled a Rorschach test and prompted Jazz to slip on her sunglasses.”
― Linda Wisdom, 50 Ways to Hex Your Lover

“May our sanctuary provide us with continued protection and strength,”
― Linda Wisdom, Hex in High Heels

“But you do choose not to reveal all the facts, which the way I see it is another form of lying.” She sipped her wine.”
― Linda Wisdom, Hex Appeal

“During this full moon we ask that our sanctuary always be there for us in our time of need.”
― Linda Wisdom, Hex in High Heels

“May our sanctuary offer us the strength we need during harsh times.”
― Linda Wisdom, Hex in High Heels

“kept the door open long enough to holler after her, “And why can’t you hit like a girl?” He stared at her retreating figure and realized that wasn’t one of his finer moments.”
― Linda Wisdom, Hex Appeal

“There was something about the Me Tarzan, You Jane scenario that revved her engines.”
― Linda Wisdom, Hex in High Heels

“The woman owned never-worn Jimmy Choos and Manolos to die for and now they’re all mine,” Jazz announced starting up the car. “Along with some choice Prada and Kate Spade bags,” she said with a reverential sigh, glancing at the bags in the passenger seat. “And the clothes,” she sighed, “she’s my size.”
― Linda Wisdom, Hex Appeal

“May our sanctuary give us sustenance and nurture us.”
― Linda Wisdom, Hex in High Heels

“Gloria Allred had nothing on a witch fighting for her bunny slippers’ rights!”
― Linda Wisdom, Hex Appeal

“Hey doll,” he growled. “You look like trouble on showgirl legs.”
― Linda Wisdom, Hex Appeal

“And may our sanctuary always give us peace.”
― Linda Wisdom, Hex in High Heels