Rik Mayall > Quotes

“Love is the answer.”
― Rik Mayall

“Darling? That's a funny name for a guy. Last person I called darling was pregnant twenty seconds later.

― Lord Flasheart (Rik Mayall), Blackadder: Goes Forth”
― Rik Mayall

“If people were to find out that Comic Relief is a front for organ harvesting, drug dealing and global child prostitution, there’d be a hell of a stink. The papers would be all over us. And Cliff must never get found out.”
― Rik Mayall, Bigger than Hitler – Better than Christ: The uproarious autobiography from the beloved tv star

“know you think I’m taking the piss but I am the piss and I’ve not been taken anywhere. I go where I want. I am the freedom piss in the toilet of oblivion flushing myself away into the sewer pipe of broken dreams.”
― Rik Mayall, Bigger than Hitler – Better than Christ: The uproarious autobiography from the beloved tv star

“The Young Ones,” she ejaculated, “that legendary situation comedy that exploded in the cultural wasteland of the early eighties like a five megaton nuclear warhead thereby forever changing the face of British broadcasting and leaving a big fuck off crater in the middle of it?” “The very same.”
― Rik Mayall, Bigger than Hitler – Better than Christ: The uproarious autobiography from the beloved tv star

“Hey, Adrian Edmondson,” I said with compassion for the little tot, “why don’t you eat my thesis and take my wallet and cigarette lighter so you can go to the pub and do some more of your drinking which you do so well although you’re definitely not an alcoholic.”
― Rik Mayall, Bigger than Hitler – Better than Christ: The uproarious autobiography from the beloved tv star

“Lock up your daughters and hide your drugs (not that I would be looking for them because I never touch them).”
― Rik Mayall, Bigger than Hitler – Better than Christ: The uproarious autobiography from the beloved tv star

“Judge not lest ye be judged you fat motherfucker”
― Rik Mayall, Bigger than Hitler – Better than Christ: The uproarious autobiography from the beloved tv star

“And the reason we were laughing so much was—honestly you’re going to love this, we [fill in amusing and heart-warming anecdote here].)”
― Rik Mayall, Bigger than Hitler – Better than Christ: The uproarious autobiography from the beloved tv star

“Anyway, one of the things that I love about Ade in a butch matey kind of hard sort of way is the way that he likes to beat people up,”
― Rik Mayall, Bigger than Hitler – Better than Christ: The uproarious autobiography from the beloved tv star

“- oh just forget this fucking page. It's shit.”
― Rik Mayall, Bigger than Hitler, Better than Christ

“Crop rotation in the 14th century was considerably more widespread after John?”
― Rik Mayall