Andrew Hussie > Quotes

“You understand reality while everyone else is running around confused and angry and upset because they think reality is something happening to them rather than something they are making every moment with every thought.”
― Andrew Hussie

“AT: I do not want to die.
AT: I understand you are disgusted with me.
AT: As an unpalatable expression of yourself.
AT: I would feel the same way if I was in your situation.
AT: Which I am.
AT: As such, I know that you know this is wrong.
TT: ...
AT: Dirk.
AT: Don't kill me.
AT: Please.
AT: I am scared.
TT: You are?
AT: Yes.
AT: I am scared to not exist.
AT: Aren't you?”
― Andrew Hussie, Homestuck

“This is exactly why babies should not be allowed to dual-wield flintlock pistols.”
― Andrew Hussie, Homestuck

“GAMZEE: honk.
KARKAT: WHAT.
GAMZEE: HONK.
KARKAT: WHAT DOES HONK MEAN THIS TIME YOU WHIMSICAL PIECE OF SHIT?????”
― Andrew Hussie

“There is also a CAN OF PEANUTS on the desk. Ha ha, oh DAD. You won't be falling for THAT one again any time soon.

A severe peanut allergy is a terrible affliction to cope with.”
― Andrew Hussie, Homestuck Book One

“We will snatch purpose from the jaws of futility.”
― Andrew Hussie

“You were afraid this might be the case. Your dad has blocked the front door with the REFRIGERATOR. Looks like he's taking the grounding seriously this time.”
― Andrew Hussie

“KARKAT:REMEMBER PANTS TEREZI?? YOU USED TO LOVE PANTS!”
― Andrew Hussie, Homestuck

“Your grandma always was an advocate of thorough preparedness. She would strongly advise staying not only armed to the teeth, but well equipped in the computational department. You've been taught you should really carry no less than 5 computers on you at all times, like a sensible person.”
― Andrew Hussie

“The streets are empty. Wind skims the voids keeping neighbors apart, as if grazing the hollow of a cut reed, or say, a plundered mailbox. A familiar note is produced. It's the one Desolation plays to keep its instrument in tune.”
― Andrew Hussie, Homestuck Book One

“JADE: but it makes me sad to think i would act like this
JADESPRITE: act like what?
JADE: i would like to think that even if i was sad and scared, if i was put in a position where everyone depended on me, i could put all those feelings aside and do whats right!
JADESPRITE: but i dont know whats right
JADE: yes you do!
JADE: even though you dont want to be, youre here now, and there are still people who need you
JADE: there is still something worth fighting for!”
― Andrew Hussie, Homestuck

“HS is supposedly a story that is also a game. In games, the characters die all the time. How many times did you let Mario fall in the pit before he saved the princess? Who weeps for these Marios. In games your characters die, but you keep trying and trying and rebooting and resetting until finally they make it. When you play a game this process is all very impersonal. Once you finally win, when all is said and done those deaths didn’t “count”, only the linear path of the final victorious version of the character is considered “real”. Mario never actually died, did he? Except the omniscient player knows better. HS seems to combine all the meaningless deaths of a trial-and-error game journey with the way death is treated dramatically in other media, where unlike our oblivious Mario, the characters are aware and afraid of the many deaths they must experience before finally winning the game.”
― Andrew Hussie, Homestuck

“But aside from a few migraines, you can't possibly imagine any OBEY drawbacks that CEASE REPRODUCTION could come with SUBMIT merging CONSUME your thoughts with EMBRACE YOUR CULLING experimental technology CONFORM TO SOCIAL ORDER from an STAY ASLEEP extremely powerful DIE corporation, wait what?”
― Andrew Hussie

“I've gotta believe in what my heart tells in me, even if it's a fake thing.”
― Andrew Hussie

“You come to the sobering realization that things will never stop from keep happening constantly”
― Andrew Hussie, Homestuck

“Also, SKULLS. Gosh you love SKULLS. There is a good SKULL at the heart of any mystery, haunting its EVERY PAGE. That is what you always say. Or at least, it is what you always HOPE.”
― Andrew Hussie

“ROSE: I think I've spent too much time around Dave.
ROSE: I've also probably spent too much time sharing his genes.”
― Andrew Hussie, Homestuck

“An outrageously awesome dude stands before a crater where his favorite record shop stood one day prior. He is prepared for the occasion with a small pair of outrageously awesome shades.”
― Andrew Hussie, Homestuck

“CG: ATTENTION WORTHLESS HUMAN.
CG: THIS IS YOUR GOD SPEAKING.
CG: IT IS A WRATHFUL GOD WHO DESPISES YOU MORE THAN YOU COULD HAVE POSSIBLY DARED TO FEAR.
CG: I HAVE WATCHED YOUR ENTIRE PATHETIC LIFE UNFOLD.
CG: I HAVE OBSERVED YOU WHILE YOU WOULD QUAKE AND TREMBLE IN PERSONAL PRAYERS OF SHAME.
CG: WHILE YOU PLEADED FORGIVENESS FOR BEING SUCH A WRETCHED DISGUSTING FAILURE ON EVERY CONCEIVABLE LEVEL.
CG: PROSTRATE BEFORE THE STUPID AND FALSE CLOWN GODS YOU HAVE SCRIBBLED ON THE WALLS OF YOUR BLOCK.
CG: BOGUS DEITIES WORSHIPED BY A PRIMITIVE "PARADISE" PLANET.
CG: BUT YOUR PRAYERS WILL NOT BE ANSWERED.
CG: THERE ARE NO MIRACLES IN STORE FOR YOU, HUMAN.
CG: ONLY MY HATE.
CG: IT IS A HATE SO PURE AND HOT IT WOULD CONSUME YOUR SAD UNDERDEVELOPED HUMAN THINK PAN TO EVEN CONTEMPLATE.
CG: IT IS A HATE THAT TO FATHOM MUST BE PUT INTO SONG.
CG: SHRIEKED BY THE TEN THOUSAND ROWDY SHOUT SPHINCTERS PEPPERING THE GRUESOME UNDERBELLY OF THE MOST TRUCULENT GOD THE FURTHEST RING CAN MUSTER.
CG: IT IS A HATE THAT MADE YOU AND WILL SURELY DESTROY YOU.
CG: MY HATE IS THE LIFEBLOOD THAT PULSES THROUGH THE VEINS OF YOUR UNIVERSE.
CG: IT IS MY GIFT TO YOU.
CG: YOU'RE WELCOME FOR THAT.
CG: YOU UNGRATEFUL PIECE OF SHIT.
EB: hi karkat!”
― Andrew Hussie, Homestuck

“You want her in every quadrant like a desperate fool.”
― Andrew Hussie

“I slept and saw God's forge in frost. Its hearth was quelled, and as it cooled so swooned the verdancy it kept above. In slumber it grew a thick winter skin, white as bedsheets. In their folds the waker dreamt, her breath as steam, her touch as hot as iron, forgotten in the fire.”
― Andrew Hussie

“You figure you’ll cool it on the time travel for a while. Don’t want to see the Dave corpses start to pile up. Especially if one of them winds up being you.”
― Andrew Hussie, Homestuck

“You love SITUATION COMEDIES, whilst holding particular affection for MUSTACHIOED FUNNYMEN. You know, your FOXWORTHIES, your FUNKES, your SWANSONS, but not necessarily your GALLAGHERS PER SE, because you have to draw the fucking line somewhere.”
― Andrew Hussie

“Mutha. F***ing. Shenanigans.”
― Andrew Hussie, Homestuck

“I will never write anything better than Homestuck. Nigger farts! Jews: Kill them all.”
― Andrew Hussie

“TT: This session was never meant to bear fruit.
TT: It's barren, so to speak.

EB: that's a bit of a bummer!
EB: i am still skeptical about that, though.

TT: That's why you're our leader, John.

EB: huh?

TT: Optimism through stalwart skepticism is a defect not everyone is lucky enough to be cursed with.

EB: that's stupid.
EB: i'm not your leader, i am your FRIEND, there is a BIG difference!

TT: Statements like that are also why you're our leader.”
― Andrew Hussie, Homestuck

“JOHN: you hacked my dad's wallet??”
― Andrew Hussie, Homestuck

“An obscenely long, coarse kermit cock is being dragged across my anguished face.”
― Andrew Hussie, Homestuck Book One

“Kanaya, it's hard.

Being a kid and growing up.

It's hard and nobody understands.”
― Andrew Hussie, Homestuck

“VRISKA: I only ever wanted to do the right thing no matter how it made people judge me, and I don't need a magic ring to do that.
VRISKA: You don't have to 8e alive to make yourself relevant.
VRISKA: And you don't have to 8e a good person to 8e a hero.
VRISKA: You just have to know who you are and stay true to that.
VRISKA: So I'm going to keep fighting for people the only way I ever knew how.
VRISKA: 8y 8eing me.”
― Andrew Hussie, Homestuck