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Start by following Lily Tomlin.
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“The trouble with being in the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat.”
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“When I was growing up I always wanted to be someone. Now I realize I should have been more specific.”
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“Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain.”
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“We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation.”
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“I said "Somebody should do something about that." Then I realized I am somebody.”
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“The road to success is always under construction”
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“Forgiveness means giving up all hope for a better past.”
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“Why is it that when we talk to God we’re said to be praying, but when God talks to us we’re schizophrenic?”
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“Reality is the leading cause of stress among those in touch with it.”
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“If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question?”
― Many Moons
― Many Moons
“No matter how cynical you get, it is impossible to keep up.”
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“Reality is a crutch for people who can't cope with drugs.”
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“I like a teacher who gives you something to take home to think about besides homework.”
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“The best mind altering drug is the truth.”
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“Reality is nothing but a collective hunch.”
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“Ninety-eight percent of the adults in this country are decent, hard-working, honest Americans. It's the other lousy two percent that get all the publicity. But then--we elected them. ”
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“If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in the library?”
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“I always wanted to be something, but now I see I should have been more specific.”
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“We're all in this alone.”
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“Don't be afraid of missing opportunities. Behind every failure is an opportunity somebody wishes they had missed.”
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“After all, in private, we're all misfits”
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“Lady, I do not make up things. That is lies. Lies are not true. But the truth could be made up if yo know how. And that's the truth.”
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“For fast-acting relief, try slowing down.”
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“Does your mind feel more and more like teflon? Nothing sticks to it?”
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“Exercise is for people who can't handle drugs or alcohol.”
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“If you read a lot of books, you're considered well-read. But if you watch a lot of TV, you're not considered well-viewed!”
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“Just remember, we're all in this alone.”
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“Instead of working for the survival of the fittest, we should be working for the survival of the wittiest - then we can all die laughing.”
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“Sometimes i worry about being a success in a mediocre world.”
― Becoming Myself: Reflections on Growing Up Female
― Becoming Myself: Reflections on Growing Up Female
“I always wondered why somebody doesn't do something about that. Then I realized I was somebody.”
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