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“You’re like a Pokémon, and my dick chooses you.”
― Master of Mayhem
― Master of Mayhem
“I didn’t even know Brandon could blush. And he is. Over me. Oh, this has just gotten interesting.”
― Master of Mayhem
― Master of Mayhem
“Tonight, I’m going to treat him like the prince he is. You know, instead of the filthy ho he sometimes is.”
― King of Thieves
― King of Thieves
“Turning into a whining puddle of need while your boyfriend is rimming you has to be frat as fuck, and if it isn’t, I’ll argue the point.”
― King of Thieves
― King of Thieves
“The thing about loving someone is - you don't get to do it with conditions attached.”
― Roommate Arrangement
― Roommate Arrangement
“The thing about loving someone is you don’t get to do it with conditions attached. I don’t love him, expecting him to return it. I don’t love him, hoping I’ll get over it, or that I can transfer that love to someone else. I just love him.”
― Roommate Arrangement
― Roommate Arrangement
“You fucking own me, Charlie.”
― Presidential Chaos
― Presidential Chaos
“Calling me a slut, Brando?” “If the empty jumbo pack of extra-large condoms fits …”
― Master of Mayhem
― Master of Mayhem
“A smile bursts across his face. “Well, joke’s on them, because I’m the queerest man-loving homo they’ll ever meet.” He holds out his hand. “Émile. I’m your date today.”
― The Husband Hoax
― The Husband Hoax
“...you left to go and meet up with who knows what kind of people.”
“The queers.” I nod. “It was the queers this time. I went to the land of my people and basked in the glow of glorious penises”
― The Husband Hoax
“The queers.” I nod. “It was the queers this time. I went to the land of my people and basked in the glow of glorious penises”
― The Husband Hoax
“Talk about yourself in the third person again. I don’t think you’ve met your douche quota for today.”
― Master of Mayhem
― Master of Mayhem
“What am I to you?” Everything. You’re every single thought, decision, and daydream I have. Every single day.”
― The Dating Disaster
― The Dating Disaster
“The only class I ever did halfway decent at was English. And can you be surprised, really, when I come up with evocative poetry like this? Thanks for the frot, your cock’s kinda hot. I’m after some more, so will you be my whore?”
― Master of Mayhem
― Master of Mayhem
“Maybe it won’t be the best blow job of his life, but like in class, I’m going to put in the effort and hopefully scrape together something passable. Because not giving your partner one hundred and ten percent during sex is the anti-frat.”
― Master of Mayhem
― Master of Mayhem
“How do you always do this?” “What?” “Make me fall for you a little more every time we’re together.” Bailey reaches down and gives my swollen cock a long, teasing tug. “All I’m doing is taking you with me.”
― King of Thieves
― King of Thieves
“A nervous sound bubbles up my throat, and I almost trip over my feet as I back up. “Welcome to Casa De Shitraw—” I blanch. “I mean dickraw—ahh, Rickshaw. It’s Rickshaw.”
― Roommate Arrangement
― Roommate Arrangement
“I want to keep you.” “Hey … that was my line.” His smile is fucking huge. “This isn’t a proposal because I don’t think I want one of those, and I have no idea if you ever would again either, but this is me saying you’re it for me. I’m never changing my mind about you. I want to move in together and discover each other’s bad habits. I want you to burn dinner and for me to be too messy for your liking. I want to argue and disagree, but once that’s over, I want us to be stronger for it. Because nothing can change how I feel about you, and I want to work to make you mine for the rest of our lives.”
― Budding Attraction
― Budding Attraction
“Then I end the video, walk out onto the balcony of our fourth-floor apartment, and drop the laptop over the edge. It hits the ground with a satisfying crack, but the silence that follows is stifling.”
― Roommate Arrangement
― Roommate Arrangement
“I grab him before he can run off. "I love you."
But it's not just Emile's voice that answers me. Five others join in. "I love you too.”
―
But it's not just Emile's voice that answers me. Five others join in. "I love you too.”
―
“I turn back to Brady and place a hand over his heart, pretending to blink back tears. “I’m so proud. May you have the spit-roasting you truly deserve.”
― The Dating Disaster
― The Dating Disaster
“And what Ian wants to see is a hurt little lamb who misses him.
I miss him like my umbilical cord.”
― The Revenge Agenda
I miss him like my umbilical cord.”
― The Revenge Agenda
“...And the fact that it’s you and it’s me just does something to me. Something I can’t put my finger on. Chemical or mental or physical … whatever it is, you’ve got me goddamn addicted. I’ve been so, so careful never to get addicted before.”
― Employing Patience
― Employing Patience
“I’m supposed to want sex. I’m supposed to be sexually active and a total deviant and be all nom nom for the cock.
I don’t think I’m doing the right kind of gagging over it.”
― Not Catching Love
I don’t think I’m doing the right kind of gagging over it.”
― Not Catching Love
“Mr. and Mrs. Kilpatrick. I wish I could say it's an honor to meet you both, but I'm not fond of lying.”
― The Husband Hoax
― The Husband Hoax
“and there in its place is a yellow crane. Grinning, I pull it down, but when I read the words, my heart stops. You’re the most perfectly un-normal person I’ve ever met. I didn’t fail. There was nothing to improve. When my heart starts again, it explodes. I drop the crane. And head for Payne’s room.”
― Roommate Arrangement
― Roommate Arrangement
“...I've never met someone so wholly good, who's focused on making everyone around him happy that he comes last. Every time. So I'm making this commitment today that you'll always come first to me. While you're busy looking out for everyone else, I'll have your back. While you're out there building an empire, I'll be passing you the bricks. Every time you have a weak moment, every time those doubts kick in, every time you don't feel worthy, I'll support you. You think love is everything? Nah. You are everything. And I'm going to remind you of that every day for forever.”
― The Bastard and the Heir
― The Bastard and the Heir
“Griff lets out a breathy laugh. Yeah, his eyes say. That was really something. It was, I agree. And I’m going to protect that something with my life.”
― Platonic Rulebook
― Platonic Rulebook
“It’s not for the team when it’s literally only you who has an endgame,” I point out.”
― Master of Mayhem
― Master of Mayhem
“Fuck, you already own me,” he mutters. “I’m so ass over tit in love with you, and I don’t know how it happened, but it smacked me upside the head. I’m silly for you. Smitten. Totally gone. You own me, and I’m not even scared. I think I like it, and I know I like falling for you. I’ve never been someone who felt like they were missing anything, and I’ve lived a full, happy life. There’s no reason for me to settle down, except, well, you make my life better. And even I’m not stupid enough to ignore something like that.”
― Employing Patience
― Employing Patience
“And you let him go?" Xanders voice gets all high-pitched, and he hits me with my pillow. "After all that? After the poor ray of sunshine, the poor dewdrop poured his heart out to you like that, and you just were all 'kthanks bye.' What is wrong with you?”
― Not Dating Material
― Not Dating Material





