Jean Meltzer > Quotes

“But what I always explained to Jacob is that these candles are a metaphor. They remind us that we always have a choice. We can be someone who snuffs out another person’s candle and, in the process, makes the world a darker place. Or we can be the type of person who spreads light. Better to be the shamash—one candle that lights all the others and brightens an otherwise dark world.”
― Jean Meltzer, The Matzah Ball

“So many people think Hanukkah is about miracles. But Hanukkah is really about fighting for the things you believe in. Everybody focuses on the oil, but there would have been no oil, no lamp and no miracle had the Maccabees not taken up arms and stormed that darn temple. That’s the thing people forget about Hanukkah. We make our own miracles, Rachel-la. We’re in charge of creating our own happy endings.”
― Jean Meltzer, The Matzah Ball

“Shmuel shrugged. “You know what bashert is?” “It’s like a soul mate.” “How very modern of you,” Shmuel teased. “Bashert literally means destiny.” “Isn’t that the same thing?” “Not exactly. Soul mate...it’s a movie concept. It’s the idea that you fall in love with someone, and off you go, living happily ever after. But in Judaism, that’s not the point of finding your bashert.” “So what is the point?” “Your other half exists to make you better. She exists to complete something you lack, and vice versa. You challenge each other, like chavruta, two blades which sharpen each other. But that’s different than love, Jacob. In some ways, it’s more powerful. Because only your bashert, your other half, can fill up what you lack...and help you fulfill your destiny.”
― Jean Meltzer, The Matzah Ball

“Mikael, the world is filled with angry and miserable people. Those people are never going to be happy for you. So you go out there and you live your truth. You be the person the universe asked you to be. And anyone who doesn’t celebrate you for it, anyone who doesn’t love you through it, screw ’em. Because we love you. Just the way you are.”
― Jean Meltzer, The Matzah Ball

“People change when they want to, when they want to put in the effort to be different. I don't believe people change overnight. Or that some epiphany happens that turns a bad man into a good one. But everyone can make a choice to be good.”
― Jean Meltzer, Kissing Kosher

“But you know what the Midrash says? God only works through broken vessels.”
― Jean Meltzer, The Matzah Ball

“Everything in life is designed to lead us to our higher purpose.”
― Jean Meltzer, The Matzah Ball

“Courage isn’t about jumping out of airplanes or building businesses from scratch. Real courage is showing up, even when you’re afraid. Real courage is putting yourself out there, even when you fail—especially when you fail. Courage is saying, this is who I am, standing up, allowing yourself to be vulnerable. And you are brave, Dara. You’re the bravest person I have ever met.”
― Jean Meltzer, Mr. Perfect on Paper

“He wanted love but didn’t feel worthy of it. And so, even though he liked her, when Rachel showed him the smallest iota of interest he did what so many adult children from broken families do—he protected himself by pushing her away.”
― Jean Meltzer, The Matzah Ball

“Truth could be scary. Darkness might always endeavor to snuff out the light, but the strength of those who truly loved us would always push us forward. This was how we brightened an otherwise dark world. We filled it with truth, and love, and light.”
― Jean Meltzer, The Matzah Ball

“Even in pain, even hurting, she was holding on to the things that gave her joy.”
― Jean Meltzer, Kissing Kosher

“Rachel shut the door on Jacob. She shut the door, like always, on the possibility of love. And then—for no reason she could pinpoint, no reason in particular—she burst into tears. A deep wail escaped her lips as she crawled back into bed. Chronic illness was the Great Decider. And it had decided for her, once again.”
― Jean Meltzer, The Matzah Ball

“Things could be imperfect and still be loved.”
― Jean Meltzer, Magical Meet Cute

“We are in charge of creating our own happy endings.”
― Jean Meltzer, The Matzah Ball

“even though he liked her, when Rachel showed him the smallest iota of interest he did what so many adult children from broken families do—he protected himself by pushing her away.”
― Jean Meltzer, The Matzah Ball

“Your other half exists to make you better. She exists to complete something you lack, and vice versa. You challenge each other, like chavruta, two blades which sharpen each other. But that’s different than love, Jacob. In some ways, it’s more powerful. Because only your bashert, your other half, can fill up what you lack...and help you fulfill your destiny.”
― Jean Meltzer, The Matzah Ball

“these candles are a metaphor. They remind us that we always have a choice. We can be someone who snuffs out another person’s candle and, in the process, makes the world a darker place. Or we can be the type of person who spreads light. Better to be the shamash—one candle that lights all the others and brightens an otherwise dark world.”
― Jean Meltzer, The Matzah Ball

“Honesty. The word was so simple for other people. But Jacob had never been a rabbi’s daughter. He had never experienced the ups and downs of a religious communal life. The way congregants gossiped, tallying up a scorecard of Shabbat dinners and sermons before negotiating your father’s contract. The way women peered into your mother’s shopping cart at the grocery store, checking on the hechsher of her items. There were rules to being a rabbinic family. There were expectations. Rachel had not met any of them. She wanted to be courageous. Speak the words that for too long had been sitting upon her heart. But Rachel loved her parents. She loved her sometimes dysfunctional but always openhearted Jewish community. What Jacob didn’t understand—because he relied on no one and therefore had no one to answer to—was that truth had consequences. Even for love, Rachel wasn’t prepared to face them.”
― Jean Meltzer, The Matzah Ball

“He was looking at her, too. Up and down. Almost immediately, all her insecurities about being ill and looking like a banshee on a bad day surfaced. She felt gross next to this man, the picture of good health and virility. But whatever... What Jacob didn’t know was that sick girls did everything better on their backs.”
― Jean Meltzer, The Matzah Ball

“But looking into her big, brown eyes, he remembered the lesson of his grandmother. This was the present. Rachel had proved herself to be reliable. Even when he did his damnedest to push her away, she had shown up for him. It was time for Jacob to show up for her.”
― Jean Meltzer, The Matzah Ball

“Jacob,” Shmuel interrupted him. “Lie to yourself all you want. But do me a favor, okay? As your friend and business partner of over a decade who’s risked everything with you on this Matzah Ball...don’t lie to me.”
― Jean Meltzer, The Matzah Ball

“Keeping kosher means that every time I eat, I think about something bigger than myself. I think about God, and my history, and the traditions of the Jewish people...and I like that. Keeping kosher forces me to live in the present, while connecting me to the past.”
― Jean Meltzer, Mr. Perfect on Paper

“How long would it last? Rachel had no way of knowing. Chronic fatigue syndrome was the Great Decider. It had decided her career, where she traveled on vacation, with whom she could be intimate. It had influenced her relationships, stolen away friendships and forced her to live in constant uncertainty, robbing her of any practical ability to plan for the future. It had deprived her of normal. The privilege of having a choice. Yet, despite all these things, Rachel Rubenstein-Goldblatt was a fighter.”
― Jean Meltzer, The Matzah Ball

“She had been too wrapped up in her own lies, too bound up by the meshugas of the unreliable narrator living inside her head to see what was always standing before her.”
― Jean Meltzer, The Matzah Ball

“We’re not the norm. We’re not typical. We’re Jews! So let’s put Judaism on fleek!”
― Jean Meltzer, The Matzah Ball

“She gave others what she had always needed from them - love and affection, security and protection, a place to land when things got bad - while never demanding the same for herself.”
― Jean Meltzer, Magical Meet Cute

“It was an amazing thing, really. To be accepted, completely, for who you were. To find your friends...and your bashert. For all their flaws, mistakes and oddities, they were people who made the world a better and brighter place to live in. They lit up the room with love and support for each other.”
― Jean Meltzer, The Matzah Ball

“But, what I learned from this journey, from finding my real-life Mr. Perfect Paper, is that love isn't something that can be quantified on a list. Love is messy. And terrifying. It shows up whwn you least expect it, and complicates your life in every way. But it's also...safe. And comforting. It allowas you to be yourself completely, without judgement or fear, and it feels right. I don't know how something so incredibly scary can also feel right, but I need to give this inkling in my heart--in my soul--a chance.”
― Jean Meltzer, Mr. Perfect on Paper

“But Hanukkah is really about fighting for the things you believe in.”
― Jean Meltzer, The Matzah Ball

“But you could have just picked up the phone, Rachel. You could have just said goodbye to me. You don’t realize how much a goodbye is worth, until you never get one.”
― Jean Meltzer, The Matzah Ball