Gregory McDonald > Quotes

“Writing is not a profession, occupation or job; it is not a way of life: it is a comprehensive response to life.”
― Gregory McDonald

“Even paranoids have enemies.”
― Gregory McDonald, Confess, Fletch

“Pardon my pants. I'm fresh from an axe murder.”
― Gregory McDonald, Confess, Fletch

“You don’t. You don’t accept it. You don’t think about it. You just leave it out there somewhere, like a part of town you never visit. You put the anger, the rage, the fury in another part of town, and you never visit it.”
― Gregory McDonald, Fletch And The Man Who

“Did you say this is a chicken sandwich?” “Chicken salad.” “Well, the chicken escaped with his life in the making of this sandwich. Very little indeed was taken off his hide. What are these green lumps in it?” “Celery.” “That’s the salad part, is it? All held together by a white paste it looks somebody has already masticated.” “That’s mayonnaise, Inspector.” “The great thing about American prepared food is how completely it’s prepared. It’s even pre-chewed.” Grover said, “You don’t like your sandwich?” “Well, there are three of us famous detectives standing over it, and any one of us would be hard-pressed to discover the chicken in it.”
― Gregory McDonald, Flynn

“Let me lay down a few ground rules," the man continued. "First, you'll be available to us at all times. Second, you will stay out of our way, confining yourself to doing what you are told to do, when you are told to do it. Third, you will see that the Boston Police Department provides all services we ask, the minute we ask for them. Fourth, you'll keep the other jerk members of the Boston Police Department in line. We don't want any locals bucking for heroes' stars on this case. Fifth, you'll keep the press, both local and national, as far away from us as possible, and then some, at all times. Is that clear?"

Flynn smiled. "And tell me, did your father indicate to your mother what his name might be the night he spent with her?" The men stared at Flynn. Some of them stepped back.”
― Gregory McDonald, Flynn

“A double extra-dry martini,” Thadeus Lowry said to the waiter. “I just shot a man through the head.”

“Very good, sir,” said the waiter.”
― Gregory McDonald

“Leave my copy alone. You don’t know what you’re doing.”
― Gregory McDonald, Fletch

“I must follow the journalistic instinct of being skeptical of everything until I personally have proved it true.”
― Gregory McDonald, Fletch

“Cocky spilled a little of the tea on the folded towel Flynn had on the edge of the desk for just that purpose—for Cocky to spill on it. “That’s lovely,” said Flynn.”
― Gregory McDonald, Flynn