Stephanie Sarkis > Quotes

“The gaslighting parent usually has a “golden child” and a “scapegoat child.” The former can do no wrong, whereas the latter can do no right. This pits siblings against each other, and these feelings of competition commonly extend into adulthood.”
― Stephanie Sarkis, Gaslighting: How to recognise manipulative and emotionally abusive people - and break free

“they get frustrated more easily, and they just don’t seem to learn from their mistakes.”
― Stephanie Sarkis, Adult ADD: A Guide for the Newly Diagnosed

“This is the gaslighters’ mantra. As noted earlier, personality disorders have a feature called ego-syntonic behavior. This means that people with a personality disorder feel that they are normal and everyone else is crazy. They feel their behavior is perfectly acceptable and meets the needs of their ego. This is one of the reasons that people with personality disorders are so difficult to treat—they don’t think anything is wrong with them or their behavior.”
― Stephanie Sarkis, Gaslighting: Recognize Manipulative and Emotionally Abusive People—and Break Free

“Which areas of the house cause you the most difficulties due to clutter and messiness? Write down the names of these rooms or areas. For each room, answer the following questions: What is your biggest problem with this room? What can you never find in this room? Have you tried to organize this room before? What were the results? What could you do differently this time to feel more successful? Do you have a lot of things you don’t need in this room, or do they just need to be grouped with similar items and stored more efficiently? Now that you know what needs to be fixed, it is time to create goals and deadlines for each room. If you could wave a magic wand and make this room exactly the way you wanted it to be, what would it look like? Would you have fewer items in the room? Would you add another piece of furniture for storage? The ideas you come up with are now your goals for the room. Next, decide on the steps and deadlines for each room. For example, one of your goals for your home office is to get rid of some of your books. Your goal, steps, and deadlines would look like this: Goal: Decrease the number of books in the home office.”
― Stephanie Sarkis, 10 Simple Solutions to Adult ADD: How to Overcome Chronic Distraction and Accomplish Your Goals

“Adults with ADD are also more likely to be unemployed. One study found that only 24 percent of ADD adults were employed, compared to 79 percent of non-ADD adults.”
― Stephanie Sarkis, Adult ADD: A Guide for the Newly Diagnosed

“Walking mindfulness practice: In his book Peace Is Every Step, Thich Nhat Hanh (1992) describes a walking mindfulness practice. You walk at a slower pace than usual. When you put your foot down, focus on how your feet feel on the earth, and how the sun and breeze feel on your face. If you see something pleasant, like a tree, just stop and observe it. When you put your other foot down, refocus all over again. This is a great practice for someone with a particularly active and jumpy mind.”
― Stephanie Sarkis, Gaslighting: Recognize Manipulative and Emotionally Abusive People—and Break Free