Daniel Siegel > Quotes

“Attachment patterns are one of the few dimensions of human life that appear to be largely independent of genetic influence. We can see this quite directly”
― Daniel Siegel, Mindsight: Transform Your Brain with the New Science of Kindness

“If, for example, your parent had a rough childhood and was unable to make sense of what happened, he or she would be likely to pass on that harshness to you—and you, in turn, would be at risk for passing it along to your children. Yet parents who had a tough time in childhood but did make sense of those experiences were found to have children who were securely attached to them. They had stopped handing down the family legacy of nonsecure attachment.”
― Daniel Siegel, Mindsight: Transform Your Brain with the New Science of Kindness

“A contingent response is when the quality, intensity, and timing of the other's signals clearly reflect the signals that we have sent. With contingent interpersonal interactions, we create a neural sense of grounding and empowerment in a social world of connections. These kinds of connections create a strong, internal coherence of the self. When contingent communication is present in our interactions, our sense of self with that person feels right. It feels good. We feel understood. We have a sense that we are not alone in the world, because our self is connected to something larger than the boundaries of our own skin. Over time, repeated patterns of contingent communication also enable us to develop a coherent autobiographical self that connects the past, present, and anticipated future. Both the here and now and the reflective autobiographical forms of conscious awareness shape our experience of ourselves in the world. (Parenting from the Inside Out)”
― Daniel Siegel

“The problem is, you can’t eliminate bad feelings and keep the good.”
― Daniel Siegel, Mindsight: Transform Your Brain with the New Science of Kindness

“Being terrific is a hard act to follow for a cautious child”
― Daniel Siegel

“Recordemos que son muchas las maneras de malcriar a los hijos —darles demasiadas cosas, rescatarlos de toda situación difícil, privarles de cualquier oportunidad para afrontar el fracaso y la decepción—, pero darles demasiado amor o atención no es una de ellas.”
― Daniel Siegel, Disciplina sin lágrimas: Una guía imprescindible para orientar y alimentar el desarrollo mental de tu hijo

“Memory is all about associations. Past experiences strongly influence what we see or feel.
Memories shape our current perceptions by causing us to anticipate what will happen next. Our past absolutely shapes our present and future. And it does so via associations within the brain.”
― Daniel J. Siegel & Tina Payne Bryson

“Having an emotional intolerance for helplessness can lead to parental behaviors that target that helplessness in children and attack them for it... When their lives provoke the intolerable emotion in us, our inability to be aware of it consciously and to make sense of it in our own lives leaves us at risk of being unable to tolerate it in our children... This intolerance can take the form of becoming blind to or ignoring our children's emotions, which gives them a sense of unreality and disconnects them from their own feelings... Then, the unsuspecting child becomes the recipient of hostile responses that become woven into his internal sense of identity and directly impair his ability to tolerate those very same emotions in himself.”
― Daniel Siegel

“Nurturing relationships involve the sharing and amplification of positive emotions and the soothing and reduction of negative ones.”
― Daniel Siegel

“Implicar a los niños en la discusión sobre la disciplina es también un fabuloso método para reducir la frecuencia e intensidad de ciertas pautas o conductas que se hayan establecido involuntariamente en tu casa.”
― Daniel Siegel, Disciplina sin lágrimas: Una guía imprescindible para orientar y alimentar el desarrollo mental de tu hijo

“a veces no hay varita mágica. Haces lo que puedes, y el niño sigue alterado. Y no por esto vas a ser un mal padre.”
― Daniel Siegel, Disciplina sin lágrimas: Una guía imprescindible para orientar y alimentar el desarrollo mental de tu hijo