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“Dad can’t read the first three quotes just like I can’t watch the first three episodes of Naruto.”
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“(While looking at the amber alert) Wow, this is like an Ace Attorney case: there’s a victim and a suspect!”
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“Kill that baby”
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“Not in church, and for the record, I’m the biggest bird”
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“Run over Erika…did I say that out loud?”
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“You know how people say dead a**, well as a man of the church I say dead bum”
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“(After mowing the lawn) It doesn’t pay much, but it’s honest work”
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