Lembit Öpik > Quotes

“It would be easier to get a computer to cry than to get Estonians to share their innermost feelings.”
― Lembit Öpik, Xenophobe's Guide to the Estonians

“It's normal to be 'normal'. Nothing is ever 'wonderful' or 'great' to an Estonian. Things are always a laconic 'usual' or, more normally, 'normal'. When an Estonian says that something is 'normal' it indicates that life is continuing on a safe, well-trodden path and that this is the way things should be. Too much excitement is treated as suspect. Essentially the Estonians agree with the Chinese curse: 'May you live in exciting times.”
― Lembit Öpik, Xenophobe's Guide to the Estonians

“Domestic animals come in two sorts - workers and pets. The working kind have a very belt and braces existence and are expected to earn their keep as guard dogs, rat cats, ornamental pub fish, etc. A 'pet' in Estonian is a lemmikloom (which means 'favourite animal') and a very much part of the family.”
― Lembit Öpik, Xenophobe's Guide to the Estonians

“Teacher to Juku's mother: 'Your son is so thirsty of knowledge! Who does he get it from?'
'The knowledge from me, the thirst from his father.”
― Lembit Öpik, Xenophobe's Guide to the Estonians

“For those countries not in Scandinavia or the Russian Federation, Estonia is perceived as part of Russia, or totally off the radar. Estonian soldiers who served in Iraq had a common complaint: no-one knew where they were from. Many of their American colleagues had never heard of Estonia or thought it was a mythical country. The Iraqis hadn't a clue either. One Estonian captain gave up - 'I told them I was from the moon,' he said.”
― Lembit Öpik, Xenophobe's Guide to the Estonians