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“There's no point in trying to drown your sorrows, Shaun; they swim better than I do.”
― Memory of Water
― Memory of Water
“A water birth was all she could think about apart from getting away from her husband, Mackay, the knight in shining armour who had proved to be a metal-plated misogynist.”
― Body of Water
― Body of Water
“I didn't sleep for three days. On day four, my shears came alive and told me I could make puppies out of mystical cake mix.”
― Behind the Seams
― Behind the Seams
“I suggest you distance yourself from the fashion world. You've already made an excellent start with that dress.”
― Behind the Seams
― Behind the Seams
“You're not broken. You're a bit chipped around the edges, but you're not broken.”
― Body of Water
― Body of Water
“We don't buy organic. I ain't paying over the odds so some chicken gets extra legroom.”
― Behind the Seams
― Behind the Seams
“There's this guy at my local Italian, yeah? Proper creepy. Reckon he wants his penne in my cunnelloni.”
― Behind the Seams
― Behind the Seams





