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“never say never. whoops - said it twice”
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“Did you hear about the blind man who went skydiving? He had a great time, but his guide dog was terrified.”
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“Woman: My granddad drowned in varnish. Man: What a horrible way to go.
Woman: Yes, but a beautiful finish.”
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Woman: Yes, but a beautiful finish.”
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“I was doing some decorating so I got out on my step ladder. I don't get on with my real ladder.”
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“Man: Doctor, I swallowed the dictionary!
Doctor: Don’t breathe a word of this to anybody.”
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Doctor: Don’t breathe a word of this to anybody.”
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“My aunt used to say, 'What you can't see can't hurt you.' She died of radiation poisoning a few months back.”
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“My dad used to say 'always fight fire with fire', which is probably why he got thrown out of the fire brigade.”
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