Deanna Roy > Quotes

“You're a survivor. Each one of you. And survivors don't have the luxury of acting like regular people. We do what we have to do to get by.”
― Deanna Roy, Baby Dust

“Crossing the line isn't about forgetting the people we love. It's about not letting our past sorrow steal our future joy.”
― Deanna Roy, Forever Innocent

“Life is short. Go after what you love and ride it as hard as you can!”
― Deanna Roy, Forever Innocent

“The Big Dipper rested neatly in the sky, surrounded by lesser bits of light, and I understood how it all fit together. Some moments of our lives were vivid and strong, hanging among all the other memories, not to be forgotten. Our baby was that constellation for us, and no matter where we looked, no matter what other stars dotted our sky, he would always be there, the biggest and the brightest of them all.”
― Deanna Roy, Forever Innocent

“Most women found that the few weeks after a miscarriage were extremely fertile, as if the body wanted to quickly rectify its mistake.”
― Deanna Roy, Baby Dust

“One part of her knew this was crazy. But most of her didn’t care.”
― Deanna Roy, Baby Dust

“For the first time in four long years, I thought — I can be that girl I once was. I can have hope. I can find happiness.”
― Deanna Roy, Forever Innocent

“Every emotion I’d ever felt was coursing through me, desire, need, joy, love, and even grief. We’d been through everything, through things people should never have to endure. No wonder we had fractured, blown apart. But we could fix it. We could get it back.”
― Deanna Roy, Forever Innocent

“What horror to face, to choose the moment of your child’s death, to see the machines whir to a stop, the monitors to beep, the line of the heartbeat to go flat. No one really recovers from that. It must be easier to harden your heart, close the recesses of pain, and live life more simply and with calm deliberation.”
― Deanna Roy, Baby Dust

“when your life trajectory is irreparably altered, you often find you can’t go back to the person you were.”
― Deanna Roy, Baby Dust

“Dot sat forward and tugged another handful of bracelets from the snarl. “Here’s something I believe.” She held up a green bracelet so that the sun shone clear through the colors on the beads. “I believe that when women like us meet, that our children in heaven also find their way to each other, on account of us all being in the same place and them watching over. So they’re all together—Stella your pair, Melinda’s, and mine. Right now, they’re up there, singing maybe, or playing Red Rover, and probably laughing at us sitting around trying to fix a mess we ourselves made.”
― Deanna Roy, Baby Dust

“He ran a finger along the border against my skin, then followed some of the stretch marks across my belly. “I never knew about these,” he said.
“They showed up later.” I tried to cover them, but he pushed my hands away.
“They’re beautiful.” He began kissing each pale line, hip to stomach and back down again. “It’s proof that Finn was once here.”
― Deanna Roy, Forever Innocent

“No use trying to outdo each other,” Dot said. “What’s easy for one might break somebody else.”
― Deanna Roy, Baby Dust

“But the cry of a baby the minute she yanked open the front door tightened her chest so hard she could scarcely catch her breath. Her baby was dead. Theirs weren’t.”
― Deanna Roy, Baby Dust

“Yep. Some things are permanent.”
― Deanna Roy, Baby Dust

“She knew life still had its problems. Jake still hated her dog. Sarah would still connive to set her children against her. Anna would still be a teenager and prone to outbursts. Her new job, if she took one, might not work out.”
― Deanna Roy, Baby Dust

“I lost our babies for us,” she croaked. “My body wouldn’t hold them.”
― Deanna Roy, Baby Dust

“That we can live out our children’s lives in a way—do things on behalf of them. It gives them a chance to have an impact.”
― Deanna Roy, Baby Dust

“, repeatedly visiting the online baby calendar to see what stage of growth the baby would have been in.”
― Deanna Roy, Baby Dust

“Jake put his phone away and clasped her hand. “I think we should lobby for a bill to make it illegal for pregnant and non-pregnant women to be in the same doctor’s office,” he said.”
― Deanna Roy, Baby Dust

“Melinda settled back against the bricks. Just go in. Let me escape. Jake would interrogate her, no doubt. Maybe she should just never go home. Get a job again and be independent. Avoid the thought of having babies. Or failing at it.”
― Deanna Roy, Baby Dust

“Yeah, the majority head out after three or four meetings. They get pregnant again, mostly, or tire of grieving and just move on. Often their partners aren’t supportive of their sadness playing out too long. They guilt them into acting like they’re better.”
― Deanna Roy, Baby Dust

“The babies seem so very far away.”
― Deanna Roy, Baby Dust

“Molar pregnancies like Janet’s are indeed rare, but they do happen. Over the last decade, frustrated and worried women have emailed me, asking why their doctors won’t pay attention to their symptoms, telling them to just “wait it out.” I think this happens because obstetricians see so many situations, and most of the time, it works out the way they expect—the recovery may be short, medium, or long, but will not require intervention. But statistics like one in five hundred are meaningless if you are the one. I always tell women who can’t get through to their doctors to start looking for one whose office responsiveness matches her needs. Not every doctor and every patient are going to be a good fit.”
― Deanna Roy, Baby Dust

“He had slid out of her without incident”
― Deanna Roy, Baby Dust

“Janet collapsed her head into her hands with relief. She’d never reached out for help before, certainly not with someone she knew so little. But this was her new life.”
― Deanna Roy, Baby Dust

“Crossing the line isn’t about forgetting the people we love. It’s about not letting our past sorrow steal our future joy.”
― Deanna Roy, Forever Innocent

“Stella nodded. She was so glad Janet had found a new doctor after all that suffering. One thing that had astounded her was how the women—smart, educated, strong women—never wanted to bother their caregivers. They silently suffered, trying to be low-maintenance patients despite their horrifying experiences.”
― Deanna Roy, Baby Dust

“And another baby could die.”
― Deanna Roy, Baby Dust

“Some moments of our lives were vivid and strong, hanging among all the other memories, not to be forgotten. Our baby was that constellation for us, and no matter where we looked, no matter what other stars dotted our sky, he would always be there, the biggest and the brightest of them all.”
― Deanna Roy, Forever Innocent