Mary Valentis > Quotes

“a woman establishes and consolidates her identity by finding love and making a permanent connection: her quest for an ideal love relationship has been the female counterpart to a man’s search for autonomy and adventure.”
― Mary Valentis, Female Rage: Unlocking Its Secrets, Claiming Its Power

“Yet judging from the female behavior that turns men on during courtship and keeps healthy marriages intact, what men really want is an independent woman who is not afraid to express herself and doesn’t have to be taken care of. She shows independence, coolness under pressure, generosity, empathy, and she likes to have sex.”
― Mary Valentis, Female Rage: Unlocking Its Secrets, Claiming Its Power

“Illusions about a partner are accompanied many times by naïveté about love itself.”
― Mary Valentis, Female Rage: Unlocking Its Secrets, Claiming Its Power

“The ideal partner of today is a cross between a psychotherapist and a good parent.”
― Mary Valentis, Female Rage: Unlocking Its Secrets, Claiming Its Power

“Many women like Kristin don’t understand that men who distance are dealing with fears of their own.”
― Mary Valentis, Female Rage: Unlocking Its Secrets, Claiming Its Power

“women’s early declaration of independence from their mothers are much more tentative than a man’s. Women find it harder to sever the cord, even from an abusive, invasive, or absent mother, and to seal off the boundaries between their mothers and themselves.”
― Mary Valentis, Female Rage: Unlocking Its Secrets, Claiming Its Power

“Females, like Avis, try harder and are more competitive about love because they fear its loss so intensely. In the dynamic, as women see it, men give love in order to get sex; women give sex in order to get love. All people play out the drama of their earliest relationships with partners. When this dynamic is unconscious, a woman will have problems with her relationships. She will expect others to take care of her and approve of everything she does. She will look to others to make her feel complete.”
― Mary Valentis, Female Rage: Unlocking Its Secrets, Claiming Its Power

“In the early stages of falling in love, many women tend to close their eyes not only to a man’s bad habits and minor quirks but to possible character flaws, emotional and psychological problems.”
― Mary Valentis, Female Rage: Unlocking Its Secrets, Claiming Its Power

“women have always made the mistake of having unrealistic expectations”
― Mary Valentis, Female Rage: Unlocking Its Secrets, Claiming Its Power