Tom Phelan > Quotes

“Oh, don’t be afraid of being a skeptic, Patrick,” Elsie said. “It’s the duty of each generation to examine the ‘wisdom’ passed on by the previous generation. We’d”
― Tom Phelan, Lies the Mushroom Pickers Told

“Is that what they talk about sitting at the fire at night? Shiting? ‘Did you have a good shite today, Eddie?’ says she. ‘A grand one,’ says he, ‘and yourself, Bridie, how was your shiting today?’ ‘Grand, Eddie. Grand. That fresh fruit is a great yoke for the evacuation of the bowels.’ For Christ’s sake!”
― Tom Phelan, Lies the Mushroom Pickers Told

“From the bottom of his nostrils to his right ear there was evidence that when Mikey had a runny nose he used his sleeve instead of a handkerchief. When he became excited he passed a gas which pierced surprised nostrils like needles dipped in rotten eggs.”
― Tom Phelan, Lies the Mushroom Pickers Told