Penny Reid > Quotes

“« Quote of the day: “Friendship is like peeing your pants; everyone can see it but only you can feel it».”
― Penny Reid, Neanderthal Seeks Human

“Stay away from the normals, the small-minded people who fill their brains with small-minded pursuits, who blend in and keep up with the Joneses. Those people will tear you down and make you boring. Instead, surround yourself with the weirds. With the misfits, oddballs, and outcasts. Because the normals, bless their hearts, have no idea how to have fun.”
― Penny Reid, Beard Science

“With you there are only two distances that matter:  Here. Not here. You are not here.”
― Penny Reid, Beauty and the Mustache

“Don’t set yourself on fire trying to keep others warm.”
― Penny Reid, Beard in Mind

“You underestimate how deeply you cut when your intentions carry no knives.”
― Penny Reid, Beauty and the Mustache

“I decided, as I succumbed to sleep, that men should come with manuals, subtitles, and reset buttons.”
― Penny Reid, Neanderthal Seeks Human

“You make me want to be less of an asshole.”
― Penny Reid, Neanderthal Seeks Human

“There are only 10 types of people in the world. Those who understand binary, and those who don't.”
― Penny Reid, Neanderthal Seeks Human

“You’ve shown me joy where before I saw only despair. You’ve taught me hope where before I knew only hopelessness. I may be broken, but all my pieces are yours. And I’ll work every day of my life to deserve you.”
― Penny Reid, Love Hacked

“We see the strengths and faults in others that we do not or cannot recognize in ourselves.”
― Penny Reid, Neanderthal Seeks Human

“have you ever seen someone and thought to yourself, Whoa, he’s hot! I’d like to screw his brains out. And then, you talk to the guy and realize someone already has?”
― Penny Reid, Truth or Beard

“Is a chameleon a coward because it can change its color? No. It’s evolved and awesome. I like to think of myself in a similar fashion. There is nothing wrong with having a strong sense of self-preservation.”
― Penny Reid, Attraction

“Apathy between family members makes the blood they share turn to water.”
― Penny Reid, Beauty and the Mustache

“Since I spent much of my childhood being left behind and ignored, one might think that, as an adult, moments of perceived abandonment would feel old hat. The truth is, as an adult, I am always waiting to be left behind. I’m always ready to be discarded and, therefore, I spend a significant amount of time preparing for this eventuality.
I lower my expectations, I don’t seek out meaningful relationships, and I don’t engage in any sort of real intimacy, physical or otherwise.
Engage is the key word here. Except, when I engage, when it happens, when I’m left behind it doesn’t feel old hat. It feels like it did the first time and it takes me by surprise. So, I don’t let it happen.”
― Penny Reid, Neanderthal Seeks Human

“I don’t like to judge people.

I love it.

Writing people completely off was liberating”
― Penny Reid, Beard Science

“She said I owned the clothes of a radiologist and the shoes of an OBGYN; which is like the medical doctor equivalent of saying that I dressed like a librarian with a propensity of fuckmeboots.”
― Penny Reid, Neanderthal Seeks Human

“I have no desire to cherish each person's bullshit and call it a beautiful snowflake.”
― Penny Reid, Neanderthal Seeks Human

“We all know that light travels faster than sound. That's why certain people appear bright until you hear them speak.” ― Albert Einstein”
― Penny Reid, Truth or Beard

“Boy bands are sent by God to aid women of all ages in their quest to avoid reality, but specifically to trick young women into believing that males think about topics other than sex.”
― Penny Reid, Friends Without Benefits

“I changed my mind.”

“You changed—”

“My. Mind.” I stopped short and faced him, placing my hands on my hips. “It’s like underpants, Jethro.”

“Dirty and dark?” He smirked.

“No.” I scowled at his facial expression. “A mind is like underpants because people change them all the time.”

“But you don’t.”

“I do change my underpants all the time, Jethro. And, for the record, I think it’s mighty rude of you to assume I don’t.”

He almost rolled his eyes, but caught the urge. “I meant your mind, Cletus. You don’t change your mind.”
― Penny Reid, Beard Science

“When you cried, I learned what helplessness tastes like. Because all I could do was swallow.”
― Penny Reid, Beauty and the Mustache

“I hadn’t seen Jennifer in a week. Absence doesn’t make the heart grow fonder. Whoever said that was a damn fool. Absence makes the heart suicidal. Take my heart for example. It hadn’t stopped hurling itself against my ribs—at odd times, day or night—for a week.”
― Penny Reid, Beard Science

“There is boring. There is sensational. There is mediocre. There is lazy. There is good. There is evil. People do implausible things all the time, and they run the gamut of moderately weird to truly extraordinary. But there is no normal. The world is an unbelievable place full of unbelievable people doing unbelievable things.”
― Penny Reid, Love Hacked

“Proposing is like giving someone your dick and a sharp knife, then waiting to see what they do next.”
― Penny Reid, Neanderthal Marries Human

“In that moment, I finally figured out what kind of handsome he was. He was fiction-handsome. Romance novel handsome; but not the clean-cut (billionaire) alpha male or even the tattooed (billionaire) bad boy archetype. He was the Scottish highlander, Viking conqueror, bodice-ripper historical romance kind of handsome; an unshaven, lion wrestling, mountain man recluse, toss you over his shoulder and plunder your goodies kind of handsome. He was both scary and swoony. I wanted to braid his beard. I also wanted to run away.”
― Penny Reid, Beauty and the Mustache

“Love was never enough, not without mutual respect and a great deal of drudgery and effort. And even then, it wasn't enough. Wanting each other, being open to change, pushing each other to improve and grow--for the better--working to deserve each other, was the key.”
― Penny Reid, Happily Ever Ninja

“No. Since I first saw you. Since I first laid eyes on you and felt sorry for every beautiful thing that was made no longer resplendent—nullified by your being.”
― Penny Reid, Beauty and the Mustache

“Blame is a thief. It robs us blind while it wastes our time, time we could be spending as a family, making memories, supporting each other.”
― Penny Reid, Neanderthal Marries Human

“If we were in Victorian England I would have called him dashing;but, since we lived in the 21st century I would have to settle for the wordier GQ model hot.”
― Penny Reid, Neanderthal Seeks Human

“Fire burns blue and hot.
Its fair light blinds me not.
Smell of smoke is satisfying, tastes nourishing to my tongue.
I think fire ageless, never old, and yet no longer young.
Morning coals are cool: daylight leaves me blind.
I love the fire most because of what it leaves behind.”
― Penny Reid, Beauty and the Mustache