Una LaMarche > Quotes

“This was the kind of guy who should be someone's first love. Someone who brought you flowers and refilled your water glass without your having to ask. Someone who watched you across the crowded rooms just to make sure you were okay. Someone who loved you quietly from a distance, without pressuring you or wanting you to change.”
― Una LaMarche, Five Summers

“We'd never talked about it, but I figured you knew the rules. If a cop stopped, you didn't run, you didn't talk back, you didn't ever, ever get angry. White people could do that—hell, they could shoot up a church and then ask for Burger King—but not us. We got killed at traffic stops for speeding, for having broken taillights, for knowing our rights.”
― Una LaMarche, You in Five Acts

“But one of the cruelties of teenagehood is that you’ll never know what your parents were really like at your age, and they’ll never accurately remember—not enough to empathize, anyway . . . maybe just enough for pity.”
― Una LaMarche, Like No Other

“Plus, he was funny, with that almost imperceptible edge of sadness that's like catnip to anyone with a double-X chromosome. Throughout our years of friendship, Adam always had some not-quite-thing going on with some not-quite-right girl. He had a knack for making everyone feel close to him, when no one really was.”
― Una LaMarche, Five Summers

“My mother used to say that no one knows what's going on in a stew but the pot and the spoon.”
― Una LaMarche, Like No Other

“Something my mom likes to say when she's up on her equal-opportunity soapbox floats through my head: People have enough reasons not to like you just based on how you look; don't give them any more based on how you act.”
― Una LaMarche, Like No Other

“And I'm not sure if it's G-d, or fate, or just air masses colliding over water, but I will say this: It feels, finally, like flying.”
― Una LaMarche, Like No Other

“The way you act can sometimes be totally different from the way you actually are.”
― Una LaMarche, Five Summers

“It’s a scientific fact that there are only a handful of jobs you’re allowed to have if you’re one of the leads in a romantic comedy: dog walker, architect, kindergarten teacher, cupcake chef, florist, special needs veterinarian, suspiciously well-paid magazine writer, and independent bookstore owner. So it stands to reason that the likelihood of meeting your soul mate in one is high.”
― Una LaMarche

“Given that my first crush was a mythical centaur hybrid of Garrison Keillor and Ted Danson, you won’t be surprised to learn that I was a late bloomer. There were other indicators, too, like my troll doll earring collection and the fact that I was naturally drawn to gorgeous best friends who transformed me, by comparison, into the homely sidekick (in troll doll earrings”
― Una LaMarche, Unabrow: Misadventures of a Late Bloomer

“hair pulled back in a little ponytail with pieces tucked behind each ear, and she’s wearing skinny jeans, a tight purple button-down, gray Converse, and thick, black-framed glasses that added up make her look like an impossibly cute hipster librarian.”
― Una LaMarche, Like No Other

“The hipster contingent has taken over a lot of the commercial streets, and now you can't go two blocks without running into some up-its-own-ass artisanal shop with a name that's just two random nouns thrown together with an ampersand. Satchel & Dove. Twig & Petal. Those are the places where you find out there's such a thing as boutique tarragon mayonnaise and that a baby onesie can legitimately cost sixty dollars. (p.169)”
― Una LaMarche, Like No Other

“You can’t worry so much about the future. It’s coming, it’s gonna happen, and it’ll be beautiful and terrible but everything will be OK.”
― Una LaMarche, You in Five Acts

“Liv never seemed to feel the threat of true failure. It was her most glaring character flaw.”
― Una LaMarche, You in Five Acts

“I keep my chin tucked in, eyes on the ground, the same stance I have when I pass by the guys from my neighborhood who laugh and call me Urkel because I wear a big backpack and don't hang out on the street all night smoking Kool XLs--and by the way, we need a new black nerd archetype; also, when are these wannabe gangstas watching reruns of Family Matters?”
― Una LaMarche, Like No Other

“In every dance movie ever made—and I knew because I’d seen them all at least ten times—the two leads fall in love.”
― Una LaMarche, You in Five Acts

“But, ladies, show me someone who gets as far as your panties and then decides to call it a night, and I will show you someone who is either unconscious or not attracted to people of your gender.”
― Una LaMarche, Unabrow: Misadventures of a Late Bloomer

“Aren't most serial killers nice-looking white boys?”
― Una LaMarche, Don't Fail Me Now

“Everyone else is running for cover, ducking under jackets and being brought to heel by runaway umbrellas blowing violently inside-out, but for some reason I don't want to move from my spot, even though I'm more than a little scared. Maybe it's my view, the elegant chaos of the New York skyline stretched out before me, buildings stacked on top of one another, holding millions of stories, any one of which could soon be mine. Maybe it's the way the driving rain feels on my skin, cool and strong, commanding the attention of all my senses and making me feel hyper-alive. Or maybe it's the winds that lift my hair off my shoulders and stream it behind me like a flock of blackbirds, rushing in my ears and filling my lungs with an energy that seems unstoppable. All I know is that I'm standing in the middle of the Brooklyn Bridge, a lone girl in a long skirt watching a storm roll in with her eyes fully open for the first time, And I'm not sure if it's God, or fate, or just air masses colliding over water, but I will say this: It feels, finally, like flying.”
― Una LaMarche, Like No Other

“In some non-Western cultures this facial hair does not have a stigma, and may even be seen as a sign of feminine beauty, as in Russia or in Iran, where connected eyebrows are a sign of virginity and a large dowry of goats.*”
― Una LaMarche, Unabrow: Misadventures of a Late Bloomer

“But the best thing about living with the guys was the “Stairway” Clean. The deceptively simple goal of the “Stairway” Clean was to clean the entire apartment in the eight minutes it took to listen to “Stairway to Heaven” at a ridiculously loud volume on Bajir’s record player. In situations of extreme filth (i.e., always), playing the song multiple times was allowed, although a two- or three-“Stairway” Clean was considered a failure.”
― Una LaMarche, Unabrow: Misadventures of a Late Bloomer