Curtis Edmonds > Quotes

“fighting for the cause since I tried starting a Working Families Party club in middle school.” “How did that work out for you?” Polly asked. “In New Haven? It was awesome. The only problem,” I admitted, “was that we could never get anyone from any working families to show up.”
― Curtis Edmonds, Snowflake's Chance: The 2016 Campaign Diary of Justin T. Fairchild, Social Justice Warrior

“A wise man once said that human beings were programmed to like boundary conditions—places like tree houses, mountain cabins, or transgressive gay bars. Boundary conditions exist in places where you can stay in one element and look at another different and fascinating element for as long as you wanted. That’s why people like beach towns like Cape May; you can sit and look at the ocean, or go in the ocean and look back at the land, whatever’s more fun. If that’s true, then maybe that’s why people go to funerals. Funerals are the boundary condition between life and afterlife. Sheldon Berkman had crossed the boundary between”
― Curtis Edmonds, Wreathed

“The Bernie Bros looked up from the vegetarian snack bar we’d put in across from the copier. “Yeah, bro,” one of them said. “Righteous.” “You’re out of organic cashew butter,” the other one said. “Got it,” I said. “See? We’re already building a solid base of support.” “Excuse me for being a progressive,” the first Bernie Bro said, “but I threw out the cashew butter. It’s not a native plant to the Northern Hemisphere.” “So what?” the second one said. “Some of us have peanut allergies. Cashew farming is totally sustainable and supporting organic cashew cultivation supports anti-deforestation efforts in Brazil. Unless there’s something anti-progressive about the rainforest.” “Microaggression. You’re forgetting the carbon footprint of shipping cashews to North America. And the cultural appropriation issues. You could just as easily eat almond butter.” “Oh, really? Have you looked at what almond growers are doing to the ecology of central California?” “Microaggression.” “Yeah,” Polly said, “that’s a solid base of support you got there. You can really build a political movement on that.”
― Curtis Edmonds, Snowflake's Chance: The 2016 Campaign Diary of Justin T. Fairchild, Social Justice Warrior

“I had been trying to find some sort of exercise program that wasn’t overly bourgeois, but I was having a problem. Weight-lifting was too obviously fascist in nature. Horseback riding was too imperialistic. I gave a lot of thought to starting a co-ed softball league, but that turns out to be closely tied to beer consumption, and I didn’t need the carbohydrates. I had to do something to improve my health that didn’t compromise my revolutionary ethics. (I went so far as to ask my mother for advice on the subject, and she sent me a link to a Chinese tour company that specialized in re-enactments of the Long March, which sounded fascinating but would take me away from Washington at a pivotal time in history, so I didn’t sign up.)”
― Curtis Edmonds, Snowflake's Chance: The 2016 Campaign Diary of Justin T. Fairchild, Social Justice Warrior

“It’s in Iowa,” I said. “Oh, so she’s volunteering for the campaign? That’s great.” “Yes, she is, and no, it isn’t. She’s working for Senator Sanders.” “She is not,” Emma said. “You are making that up. Your mom knows Hillary from way back.” “She knows Bernie from way back, too,” I said. “She was the co-chairman of Leninists for Sanders from the first time that he ran for Senate.” “Leninists for Sanders?” “Well, there were only six of them. But they were very vocal.”
― Curtis Edmonds, Snowflake's Chance: The 2016 Campaign Diary of Justin T. Fairchild, Social Justice Warrior

“All right,” Polly said. “Your assignment for today is to say nice things about Mitt Romney.” Everyone in the conference room for the daily intern orientation groaned. A couple of people booed. “I don’t like it any more than you do,” Polly said. “But the fact is that Romney’s come out for a minimum wage increase. That puts him at odds with the House Republicans. You know how the game works as well as I do. We’re united; they’re divided. We’re for principle; they’re for political expediency. We’re the centrists; they’re the extremists. Something like this is gold for us, and you don’t let gold pass through your hands.”
― Curtis Edmonds, Snowflake's Chance: The 2016 Campaign Diary of Justin T. Fairchild, Social Justice Warrior

“Polly leaned back in her chair. “How does a bill become a law?” she asked. “Oh,” I said. “I know all about that. The idea for the bill emerges from the revolutionary consciousness. Advocates gather to demand social change. That gets transmitted to the political leadership, and they channel that positive energy into progressive legislation.” “Please tell me you’re not serious,” Polly said. “Of course, then it gets blocked by the greedy corporate special interests. But committed advocates for social justice can help change the system. You know, make a difference. That’s why I’m here.”
― Curtis Edmonds, Snowflake's Chance: The 2016 Campaign Diary of Justin T. Fairchild, Social Justice Warrior

“Shouldn’t I want to aspire to a higher standard?” I said. “That’s not how double standards work,” she said. “I thought we went over this.” “So I am releasing my taxes to satisfy an imaginary double standard with respect to releasing my taxes, while taking advantage of an actual double standard with regard to the fact that I didn’t pay any taxes?” “Now you’re getting it,” Polly said. “Do you have any of those Advils you usually carry?” I asked. “Because I think I have a headache.”
― Curtis Edmonds, Snowflake's Chance: The 2016 Campaign Diary of Justin T. Fairchild, Social Justice Warrior

“It turned out that SHIELD was internally divided, just the same way that we are in this country. Except that there’s only one division that matters,” Emma said. “And it’s not progressive versus conservative, or even Republican versus Democrat. And I think you know what that is.” “It’s between people who start sentences with conjunctions versus people who don’t?” I asked.”
― Curtis Edmonds, Snowflake's Chance: The 2016 Campaign Diary of Justin T. Fairchild, Social Justice Warrior

“But, according to Shakespeare, perfect justice isn’t obtainable or even desirable. What we should be seeking, instead, is mercy, and what we should be doing are “the deeds of mercy.” But was that kind of mercy more important than social justice? Had I gotten everything wrong all along? Should I be a social mercy warrior instead? What would that even mean? Who would I be merciful towards?”
― Curtis Edmonds, Snowflake's Chance: The 2016 Campaign Diary of Justin T. Fairchild, Social Justice Warrior

“It doesn’t matter anyway,” Polly said. “I already gave Reid’s office my best advice.” “What was that?” I asked. “Tell him to stop saying stupid things,” she said. “What did they say?” “They asked me what my second-best advice was. I said, ‘Retirement,’ and they hung up.”
― Curtis Edmonds, Snowflake's Chance: The 2016 Campaign Diary of Justin T. Fairchild, Social Justice Warrior

“I made it back to New Haven for the start of the major holiday that falls a week before the first day of the Gregorian calendar. (My mother objects to Christmas, the Gregorian calendar, and me and my brothers not being home for the last week in December, although not approximately in that order.)”
― Curtis Edmonds, Snowflake's Chance: The 2016 Campaign Diary of Justin T. Fairchild, Social Justice Warrior

“Children, what is the face of the real enemy?” “Islamic terrorism,” Emma said. “The white supremacist patriarchy,” Monique said. “Fox News,” I said. “A gold star for Justin,” Aunt Joan said.”
― Curtis Edmonds, Snowflake's Chance: The 2016 Campaign Diary of Justin T. Fairchild, Social Justice Warrior

“If we can show we’re paying interns a living wage, then that makes our offensive that much more credible,” I said. Polly rubbed her temples, which is something she does when her headache pain returns. “Before you seriously consider just how much of a financial hit we would take in paying interns,” she said, “and what that would do to payroll, including my job, you should check your privilege. After you do that, get back to work.” At first, I didn’t know why my privilege had anything to do with anything, but I checked it anyway, because it’s always a good idea. I decided that she was right. A minimum-wage increase would do more to help low-income workers than the issue of whether or not my fellow interns and I were able to earn a few more dollars a week, and anything I could do to help get the legislation passed--even saying nice things about Mitt Romney!--was more important than ideological consistency and purity.”
― Curtis Edmonds, Snowflake's Chance: The 2016 Campaign Diary of Justin T. Fairchild, Social Justice Warrior

“THE LEWINSKY PROCEDURE: A STRATEGY GUIDE FOR MINIMIZING POLITICAL SCANDAL Deny -The necessary first stage, where you question the accuracy of the facts. It will take time for all the scandalous details to come out, and if you’re careful or lucky, they may never come out. Deny everything until the point that the facts against you can be substantiated. Delay -Take every action possible to stall, postpone, impede, procrastinate, and filibuster. The longer the time between the initial news of the scandal and the resolution of the scandal, the better. Diminish -Once the facts against you have been substantiated, either minimize the nature of the scandal or its impact against you. “At this point, what difference does it make?” Debunk -Have a helpful news organization or advocacy group develop a useful counter-narrative that explains away the scandal or contradicts the facts or generally does something to get progressives back on your side. “Explanatory journalism” is a great help here. Distract -Change the conversation by talking about something else. It doesn’t matter what that might be, because there’s always something else more important, even if it’s reminding people to drink more water. Suggest that the scandal itself is a distraction from the real issues. Deflect -When in doubt, blame the Republicans. All administrative failures can be blamed on the failures of the prior administration. All political failures can be blamed on Republican legislation or Republican intransigence in not passing progressive legislation which would have fixed the problem. All personal failures can be excused by either bringing up the example of a Republican who did something similar, or by pointing out that whatever was done wasn’t as bad as serving divorce papers on your wife when she’s in the hospital with cancer, or invading Iraq. Divide -Point out that the scandal is being driven by the most extreme Republicans, and that moderates aren’t to blame. This won’t help you with moderates that much, but it will give the moderates another reason not to like the extremists, and vice versa, and this can only be positive. Deploy -Get friends and allies to talk about your positive virtues in public, without reference to the scandal. If the scandal comes up, have them complain about the politics of personal destruction. Demonize -Attribute malign intentions to the conservatives trying to promote the scandal. This approach should also include special prosecutors, judges, and anyone else who is involved in the scandal to one degree or another. Defenestrate -When necessary, shove someone under the bus. Try not to make this a habit, or you won’t have anyone around to deploy. The target for defenestration can be small (rogue employees in the Cincinnati regional office) or large (Cabinet secretary) but it needs to be someone who won’t scream overly much as they sail out the window. ❄ ❄ ❄”
― Curtis Edmonds, Snowflake's Chance: The 2016 Campaign Diary of Justin T. Fairchild, Social Justice Warrior

“Or maybe we could send you to grad school, where you’d learn something useful. I know a few people at the University of Chicago, if you want your economics degree. Expand your horizons a little.” “You’re throwing me to the Straussians?” I said, in horror.”
― Curtis Edmonds, Snowflake's Chance: The 2016 Campaign Diary of Justin T. Fairchild, Social Justice Warrior

“You didn’t play soccer growing up?” Emma asked. “Let me guess. You couldn’t because your mother wouldn’t let you because they used white chalk, and she thought that was racist.” “Don’t be ridiculous,” I said. “It was a land-use issue. She thought the soccer fields should be turned into community gardens.”
― Curtis Edmonds, Snowflake's Chance: The 2016 Campaign Diary of Justin T. Fairchild, Social Justice Warrior

“She’s worse off, if anything. She’s got election-induced Tourette’s syndrome. You’ll just be talking to her, and she’ll say something like ‘Majority Leader McConnell,’ and then cry for an hour. It’s not been a good week for either of us.”
― Curtis Edmonds, Snowflake's Chance: The 2016 Campaign Diary of Justin T. Fairchild, Social Justice Warrior

“she was mostly steamed about how I’d portrayed my conversation with the Amtrak gate agent in Atlanta. She thought that my account fit in too closely with the white-male capitalist hierarchical construct of Amtrak as a failure of central planning, and that I should have tried to advance a narrative more consistent with both social realism and the need for additional Amtrak funding. I tried to explain to her that I’d written the blog post based on what actually happened, which got me a lecture on the difference between objectivity and advocacy in the pursuit of social justice for the downtrodden proletariat. “But she wasn’t a proletarian,” I said. “If anything, she was petty-bourgeois.” I got a long lecture after that about mystification and revolutionary sentiment and code-switching, which I wish I had recorded now because it would have made for an awesome episode of that NPR podcast everyone is listening to.”
― Curtis Edmonds, Snowflake's Chance: The 2016 Campaign Diary of Justin T. Fairchild, Social Justice Warrior