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“I should have picked middle management, then I could have specialized in a constant stream of pointless bullshit and unrealistic deadlines.”
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“Are you sure? We still have some time. Maybe you can beat the crap out of a box of puppies.”
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“Apparently when considering the correct response to the fight or flight reflex my body went for secret door number three, which is stand in the same spot and scrunch my face up like my poop is coming out sideways. Natural selection at work.”
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“Alas no, I can only see the code, I can’t modify it. That would be like trying to hack into MI5 using your calculator.”
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