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“Anubis is associated with the mummification and protection of the dead for their journeys through Denver International Airport to the afterlife. He is usually portrayed as being half human and half jackal, and holding a metal detector in his hand ... Anubis is employed by the Department of Homeland Security to examine the hearts of all travellers to make sure they have not exceeded the weight limit for psychological baggage ... He is also shown frisking mummies and confiscating firearms and other contraband. It doesn't take much to tip the scales in favour of a dead body cavity search or an afterlifetime travel ban.”
― The Most Wretched Thing Imaginable or, Beneath the Burnt Umbrella
― The Most Wretched Thing Imaginable or, Beneath the Burnt Umbrella
“The dog sniffed at the bonfire like a ship with a wet nose docking at a foreign port." -Mgru”
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“Telling a woman that you will be unable to climax unless you are looking at her in a mirror is, in my experience, an excellent way to ensure the only place you will ever see her again is in depressing memories.”
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