Adam Marsh > Quotes

“Just so we’re clear, toward the beginning of Back to the Future when Marty’s band is trying out for the school talent show and doesn’t get in, it isn’t that the uptight, uncool Establishment doesn’t get his music, Marty McFly just plays guitar like an asshole.”
― Adam Marsh, ATOMIC BEBOP HULLABALOO

“For shoes, I pick my two-tone black and red leopard Creepers which have no cool backstory.”
― Adam Marsh, ATOMIC BEBOP HULLABALOO

“You know what? Smurf you, mothersmurfer! Smurf you in your smurfing smurf! You know what you are? You’re a smurfing bigot and I don’t need this smurf!”
― Adam Marsh, ATOMIC BEBOP HULLABALOO

“We’re gonna make Dr. Ignatius Tastywiggle an offer he can’t understand.”
― Adam Marsh, ATOMIC BEBOP HULLABALOO

“If I sense so much as a single hanky or a panky, I’m out.”
― Adam Marsh, ATOMIC BEBOP HULLABALOO

“Naturally, I’ve heard of the Gelatinists and all the crazy conspiracy theories that surround the cult and their smooth-talking messiah, Dr. Ignatius Tastywiggle, but to my knowledge, this is the first time I’ve ever encountered one in real life.”
― Adam Marsh, ATOMIC BEBOP HULLABALOO

“I’ve got intestinal nightmares that would make your marshmallow mask spin like a dreidel on the third day of Chanukah, but that’s a topic for a different night.”
― Adam Marsh, ATOMIC BEBOP HULLABALOO

“Like hell! He only gave me fifteen hundred one dollar coins in a greasy Crown Royal bag with the assurance that they’d soon triple in value. Spoilers: They didn't.”
― Adam Marsh, ATOMIC BEBOP HULLABALOO

“Oh! I’m sorry. Charo was right. Never go against the coochie-coochie.”
― Adam Marsh, ATOMIC BEBOP HULLABALOO

“It wasn’t Grand Canyon, Tastywiggle was saying. That fucker invented a gran cannon and the bubble on R2-DMitra’s back is a hopper filled with old people that is shoots as ammunition!”
― Adam Marsh, ATOMIC BEBOP HULLABALOO

“Well here, look at this and see if it brings to mind any fancy curse words people don’t use anymore. Try working in balderdash if you can. That one’s always been a personal favorite of mine.”
― Adam Marsh, ATOMIC BEBOP HULLABALOO

“I do it, because for every Doctor Haircut or Bubba Law: NASCOP pristine prime-time drama that helps back-up the argument that we are in the midst of a second Golden Age of Television, there are shows about boxes of cereal turned vigilante after being framed for their wife’s murders and garbage men with Emmanuel Lewis for a leg fighting off clockwork Tom Waits zombies that need a-watchin’. Anyone can enjoy the good stuff. It takes a special kind of guy to appreciate the awful. And I like to think of myself as that guy.”
― Adam Marsh, ATOMIC BEBOP HULLABALOO

“Plus, it gives me time to admire the old maxi pad machine hanging on the wall in here that for some reason has been converted to now dispense individually wrapped pierogis, or Commie Hot Pockets as my fairly xenophobic grandmother used to call them, for the princely sum of seventy-five cents a piece.”
― Adam Marsh, ATOMIC BEBOP HULLABALOO

“The Pussy Hound gives me that obnoxious heart-shaped hands thing that I can’t believe people are still doing.”
― Adam Marsh, ATOMIC BEBOP HULLABALOO

“Full disclosure. I’m a guy weaned on the reruns of 1970’s and 80’s action/adventure TV shows. You couple that with a pretty white trash upbringing that, when not down at the comic book shop and learning about the art of Jack Cole and obscure Italian crime movies from Von Rudy, translated into an inordinate amount of time spent hanging around Lemons Speedway unsupervised while my mother looked for love, and you’ll see that my convincing a broken down daredevil stuntman drinking buddy of my mom’s named No Eyes Majewsky into teaching me how to pull out of a parking space like Jim Rockford and then raise hell on four wheels seemed like the most natural thing in the world.”
― Adam Marsh, ATOMIC BEBOP HULLABALOO

“The sway of her hips is hypnotic. Hmm, I wonder if that’s where that comes from, hip-notic.”
― Adam Marsh, ATOMIC BEBOP HULLABALOO

“This is more of a tax for being a dumbass than anything else.”
― Adam Marsh, ATOMIC BEBOP HULLABALOO

“I know that what Rocket’s wearing while obviously being kidnapped isn’t important, but I can’t help but notice.”
― Adam Marsh, ATOMIC BEBOP HULLABALOO

“Y’know what? Fuck it. Good for you. Go out there and get all that dick. Shit, put it in sideways if you have to and then pack some more dicks in there with it to take up whatever extra room may be left and then stuff in one more for good measure. Infinity dicks is what I wish you.”
― Adam Marsh, ATOMIC BEBOP HULLABALOO

“Professor Pietro Proteus? No shit? We interned together back when we were both starting out. Good man. He still a monkey? No matter. Don’t answer that. Ain’t my place to judge.”
― Adam Marsh, ATOMIC BEBOP HULLABALOO

“Do you really think Dizzy Pendergrass could do all this? I mean look around. This is a big operation I’ve got going on here. From what I’ve seen that guy isn’t exactly busting at the seams with ambition or the ability to sign a commercial rental agreement.”
― Adam Marsh, ATOMIC BEBOP HULLABALOO

“Things rarely get farther past the scripting phase, where they always inevitably try and make a character, who is at his core the purest form of concentrated hate and evil in the universe, into some kind of darkly comedic antihero, and thus fail miserably every time.”
― Adam Marsh, ATOMIC BEBOP HULLABALOO