M.D. Massey > Quotes

“He made a sound that was halfway between a fart and giving me strawberries.”
― M.D. Massey, Underground Druid

“You know, your story is not all that unique in the supernatural world. Many a were-creature has had a similar experience the first time they turned. And, similar to your predicament, many therianthropes have tried to commit suicide in the midst of their grief and self-loathing, only to wake up the next day with one less round in their gun.”
― M.D. Massey, Junkyard Druid

“Next time you face a Fomorian, don’t offer parley. We don’t negotiate for surrender.”
― M.D. Massey, Druid Arcane

“Maureen harrumphed loudly. “Oh, woe is me! Lad, do ya’ think yer the only one who ever lost someone? Try living a few centuries, and then come crying to me.” Her expression softened a bit, perhaps because I glanced down at Ed’s chair. “Ah, I know it’s hard, but life goes on. You need ta’ suck it up, because your problems are only going ta’ get worse while yer busy crying in yer panties.”
― M.D. Massey, Druid Enforcer

“And you still blame yourself.” A statement, not a question. I flew out of the chair and roared at her. “Of course I blame myself! I remember everything—everything! Every moment of madness as the curse kicked in. It was like the real me stepped outside myself, and another me—a darker part of me—took over. I was just a passenger as I watched it all happen. And there was nothing, nothing I could do about it!” I slumped back down into the chair, feeling defeated and drained just by that simple admission of guilt and shame.”
― M.D. Massey, Junkyard Druid

“It’s fucking pathetic, the way you beat yourself up for shit you had no control over and that wasn’t your fucking fault in the first place. It’s time you stopped.”
― M.D. Massey, Druid Vengeance

“So what you’re saying is, embrace the”
― M.D. Massey, Moonlight Druid

“When all you have is a hammer, every problem looks like a nail.”
― M.D. Massey, Moonlight Druid

“Samson likes you, so this should go well so long as you’re respectful and listen to what he has to say. But as for the girl, well—you touch that hot stove enough, and eventually you’ll learn how to stop when you’re ahead.”
― M.D. Massey, Junkyard Druid

“Nope, it was the hunter’s life for me, and Jesse felt the same way. We’d bonded over that first kill, and as we’d matured we’d become more than just friends and partners.”
― M.D. Massey, Junkyard Druid

“One of the great things about Austin was the fact that we had a lot of hippies who voted, and they loved their green spaces.”
― M.D. Massey, Graveyard Druid

“Animals loved that guy, especially dogs, who didn’t hold grudges and didn’t care how screwed up a human was. They’d ignore your faults and love you just the same.”
― M.D. Massey, Junkyard Druid

“Rule one—you take love where you can find it, if it’s real. Rule two—when it’s time to go, you always leave your lover better off than when you found them. And rule three? You never break a young girl’s heart. Not if you can help it.”
― M.D. Massey, Graveyard Druid

“Manannán mac Lir.”
― M.D. Massey, Underground Druid

“You’re a pagan, you don’t believe in sin.” “Hah!” he countered. “Who do you think invented the concept, long before the first missionaries set foot on my fair isle? Just because we didn’t worship the Christian deity, it doesn’t mean we didn’t have morals.”
― M.D. Massey, Junkyard Druid

“Cognoscenti Therapy Associates, Austin, TX—Six Months Later I sat across from Dr. Larsen in her office, which was located in a hip, upscale business complex in a newly gentrified area of East Austin, just a few blocks from the downtown district.”
― M.D. Massey, Junkyard Druid

“I hated reading her the riot act, but Sabine was half-glaistig, so her powers were mostly related to glamour and causing excessive lactation in cows and goats.”
― M.D. Massey, Graveyard Druid

“Luther had become heavily involved in the gay and lesbian community in the last several decades. And just why would a three-hundred-year-old vampire choose to blend in among the LGBTQ community? Well, to put it in Luther’s words, “Honey, nobody screws with the Velvet Mafia. No one. I’m a gay black man, and a vampire. That gets me a lot of enemies. But for the first time in history I can live a public life, and not have to worry about being singled out for being gay or found out for being a vamp.”
― M.D. Massey, Junkyard Druid

“Póg mo thóin, bitch.”
― M.D. Massey, Graveyard Druid

“Those guys were rubbery ninjas that healed like Deadpool. Just as ugly, too, but damned handy to have in a fight.”
― M.D. Massey, Graveyard Druid

“Vlad the Impaler–style on an old speed-limit sign,”
― M.D. Massey, THEM, Season 1, Episode 1

“She was very pretty, with fine Roman features and the kind of olive skin you couldn’t get from a tanning bed or spray booth. She had dark, thick hair, lush, but not quite full lips, and the body of a runway model. I noted this all in a sort of detached, clinical manner, because it distracted me from the topic of discussion.”
― M.D. Massey, Junkyard Druid

“Sure, the human body could go through the ringer.”
― M.D. Massey, Breach of Magic

“The business was a cover for what we really did behind the scenes, before Finn became an addict. Anyway, Maureen was a half-kelpie who’d been handling Finn’s affairs for several centuries.”
― M.D. Massey, Junkyard Druid

“shot placement is everything in a gunfight, and those who rush the shot often hurry to the morgue.”
― M.D. Massey, Deadlands Druid

“Um, Colin? When you’re done playing with your shaft, you might want to deal with the big mean-looking fella over there.”
― M.D. Massey, Underground Druid

“I was more like a bard, while she was like a dual-classed ninja paladin.”
― M.D. Massey, Graveyard Druid

“Let me tell you, son, I got more games than Milton-fucking-Bradley and more time to play them than Father-fucking-Time!”
― M.D. Massey, Junkyard Druid

“no plan survives first contact with the enemy.”
― M.D. Massey, THEM, Season One

“And a witch she is, in every sense of the word. She was a sorceress among the Tuatha Dé Danann, these old-school Irish deities who were eventually defeated by mankind and forced underground, and who would later become known as the sidhe—faery folk.”
― M.D. Massey, Junkyard Druid