Michael Thompson > Quotes

“A Beloved Son is one who experiences the unconditional love of his Father in a way that deeply impacts him and leaves him with:
Nothing to Hide,
Nothing to Prove,
Nothing to Fear.”
― Michael Thompson, The Heart of a Warrior: Before You Can Become the Warrior You Must Become the Beloved Son

“My work with men these past twenty years has convinced me that men are either entering a battle, they are in a battle or they are emerging from one.”
― Michael Thompson, The Heart of a Warrior: Before You Can Become the Warrior You Must Become the Beloved Son

“the best academic grounding for their son may be quiet, sustained play at home and a kindergarten that emphasizes socialization, play, and the out-of-doors.”
― Michael Thompson, It's a Boy!: Your Son's Development from Birth to Age 18

“What are the reasonable expectations for a boy his age, and are there any plausible nonmedical explanations for his behavior?”
― Michael Thompson Phd, Raising Cain: Protecting the Emotional Life of Boys

“When we look at such boy play through the adult lens of violence, we miss the opportunity to use it as a window into a boy’s hidden emotions.”
― Michael Thompson, It's a Boy!: Your Son's Development from Birth to Age 18

“The most important thing to remember, the guiding principle, is to try to keep your son’s self-esteem intact while he is in school. That is the real risk to his success and to his mental health. Once he’s out of school, the world will be different. He’ll find a niche where the fact that he can’t spell well, or didn’t read until he was eight, won’t matter. But if he starts to hate himself because he isn’t good at schoolwork, he’ll fall into a hole that he’ll be digging himself out of for the rest of his life.”
― Michael Thompson, Raising Cain: Protecting the Emotional Life of Boys

“Maccoby’s conclusion is that there is some kind of “prenatal hormonal priming” that predisposes boys and girls to respond differently to different kinds of social stimuli. That is, the male hormones that have washed the brains of boys in the womb produce a different style of play in boys three years later.”
― Michael Thompson, It's a Boy!: Your Son's Development from Birth to Age 18

“Few things that are made quickly endure.”
― Michael Thompson, The Heart of a Warrior: Before You Can Become the Warrior, You Must Become the Beloved Son

“Labeling we use to define a boy only obscures him. It is of no help to boys and no help to us, either.”
― Michael Thompson, It's a Boy!: Your Son's Development from Birth to Age 18

“In an intriguing study by Richard Fabes and Nancy Eisenberg at the University of Arizona, researchers played a tape of a baby crying to a group of kindergarten and second-grade boys and girls and monitored their physiological and behavioral reactions.3 Specifically, they noted whether the child tried to eliminate the troubling sound by turning off the speaker or to soothe the baby in a manner that had been demonstrated previously by an adult—talking to the baby over the speaker. The results? The girls were less upset by the crying. They made greater efforts to calm the baby and less often moved to turn the speaker off. Boys whose heart rate pattern showed that they were quite stressed by the crying also were quick to “turn off” the crying with a flip of the speaker switch. These distressed boys were also more likely to act aggressively toward the baby—telling it to “shut up,” for instance. Boys whose heart rate showed a lower stress level were more likely to comfort the infant. The researchers theorized that children—in this case, boys—who are more easily stressed by emotional responses may prefer to avoid them. In other words, boys who have trouble managing their own emotions may routinely tune out the cues of other people’s upset.”
― Michael Thompson Phd, Raising Cain: Protecting the Emotional Life of Boys

“But sometimes parents get confused about boys. Why do parents hesitate to discipline boys? Or why do they make the mistake of disciplining them too harshly? They do it because they are shocked, ashamed, or confused—shocked because they cannot believe that their loving baby boy is suddenly so oppositional, ashamed because they feel inadequate and afraid that they really are raising a male monster, and confused because they cannot figure out how much “aggressive” behavior is tolerable in a boy. The last point is a fascinating and difficult one. How much activity and aggression should parents tolerate in a boy? And how can you tell the difference between activity and aggression?”
― Michael Thompson, It's a Boy!: Your Son's Development from Birth to Age 18

“The most critical need of the Church at this moment is men, bold men, free men. The church must seek, in prayer and much humility, the coming again of men made of the stuff of which prophets and martyrs are made. —A. W. Tozer”
― Michael Thompson, The Heart of a Warrior: Before You Can Become the Warrior, You Must Become the Beloved Son

“Only by practicing stillness aggressively, pushing all the clamor and busyness of life aside, can a man truly experience God. In the still and quiet, discernment is learned so that in the heart of the battle it can be practiced. If a man can’t practice it when things are still, there is no way he will be able to do so when the arrows are flying.”
― Michael Thompson, The Heart of a Warrior: Before You Can Become the Warrior, You Must Become the Beloved Son

“Every father has to choose and choose again how involved he will be with his children. Why does he have a choice when his wife does not?”
― Michael Thompson, It's a Boy!: Your Son's Development from Birth to Age 18