Meg Haston > Quotes

“Death is not an exact science, which is irritating for those of us who appreciate precision.”
― Meg Haston, Paperweight

“Promise was like a precious stone, she told me: hypnotising, but after a while the weight of it could sink you.”
― Meg Haston, Paperweight

“We are all a collection of lost causes, stashed here so no one has to see just how wounded we are.”
― Meg Haston, Paperweight

“The thing was, I needed to be owned. I needed someone to say, This girl is mine. That´s what family is for, but mine was almost gone. There was no one to claim me but Eden and my sickness. So I gave myself to both.”
― Meg Haston, Paperweight

“The girl in the mirror was too much and not enough.”
― Meg Haston, Paperweight

“It's nice to see the world that way sometimes, blurred around the edges like I've snuck to the bottom of the ocean and am staring up at the sun.”
― Meg Haston, Paperweight

“Yes, the illness took away. It clawed at family and time and the very beating of our hearts. But it gave, too. For me, it was the only way I could move through life blurry, without having to see things as they really were. It would have been too much that way, having to stare at my life head-on.”
― Meg Haston, Paperweight

“My body is both weapon and wound, predator and prey. I will self-destruct without any help.”
― Meg Haston, Paperweight

“We're meant to be part of a we. Something bigger, something outside of ourselves.”
― Meg Haston, Paperweight

“But we are a group of girls so overwhelmed by our mere existence that it's almost paralyzing, the idea of dealing with the "big picture" issues. It's the reason we got this way to begin with. The reason a single caloric unit takes on such importance, the reason the pound becomes our currency of worth. These are things we can manage.”
― Meg Haston, Paperweight

“I think there are some things we shouldn’t accept. And living sick is one of those things.”
― Meg Haston, Paperweight

“But every time I near sleep, I'm scared shitless. Because the memories are coming faster now, pouring through me, as if I've broken the handle on the faucet. They are coming, no matter how much is hurts. And all I can do is hold my breath and try not to drown.”
― Meg Haston, Paperweight

“I should be remembering running through the sprinkles with Josh when we were kids. I should be remembering standing over the spray, blinking with wet lashes at the millions of rainbows. That´s what Eden took from me; that´s what I gave away: the sacred importance of the real things. The things that mattered.”
― Meg Haston, Paperweight

“I believe, Stevie, that human beings...we're oriented toward health. Meaning, your body wants to heal. Your mind wants to heal. If you can get to a place where you let your mind and body do what they want to do, you will start to move toward health.”
― Meg Haston, Paperweight

“Every person should be able to choose her own particular brand of suffering.”
― Meg Haston, Paperweight

“I curse my mother with every step. She thinks paying for this place will erase her sins. I hope they call her as soon as they realize I´m gone. I hope she feels powerless. I hope she knows: She did this. This is her fault.”
― Meg Haston, Paperweight

“I think that maybe for some people, family is just the people you’re standing next to when awful things happen.”
― Meg Haston, Paperweight

“I think that for some people, family is just the people you're standing next to when awful things happen.”
― Meg Haston, Paperweight

“Acceptance doesn't mean you like something, doesn't mean you're comfortable with it. But it does mean that you acknowledge it for what it is.”
― Meg Haston, Paperweight

“Most of all, I miss the biggest thing, the most important, enormous thing in the world: that he knew how to love me, and did.”
― Meg Haston, Paperweight

“You wanted an anorexia diagnosis.” I would puke, if there was anything left inside me. Why is she doing this to me? “Tell me what it means, Stevie. What does it mean about you, the bulimia diagnosis?” The words come instantly, rushing past one another on my tongue. “That I’m fat. That I’m lazy. No self-control. Disgusting. Weak. The lowest of the low.”
― Meg Haston

“The thing was, I needed to be owned. I needed someone to say, This girl is mine.”
― Meg Haston, Paperweight

“Wish I could just snap my fingers and bring him back for a second. I'd ask him what to do, and he'd know, because he knew how to take care of people in a way I never did. Or at least he knew how to try.”
― Meg Haston, Paperweight

“We’re not born hating,”
― Meg Haston, Paperweight

“This is the terrible thing girls like us have in common" she explained. "Parents, upbringings,lifestyles, that are painfully normal. Middle class."
It was almost amoral, being raised this way, she told me fiercely. We'd never really understand pain. And wasn't that the human condition? By shielding us from the real world, pressing their palms over our eyes during all the bad parts. our parents -our parents-were keeping us separate from humanity. We were something else entirely”
― Meg Haston, Paperweight

“It’s a grieving process,” Shrink agrees. “When you make the decision for health, for recovery, you make the choice to let go of your eating disorder. Have any of you ever felt that that the eating disorder was almost a companion?”
― Meg Haston, Paperweight

“The reason a single caloric unit takes on such importance, the reason the pound becomes our currency of worth. These are things we can manage.”
― Meg Haston, Paperweight

“It occurred to me then that maybe Wil Hines didn't have blood in his veins like everyone else. Maybe he was made of Florida things: grains of bleached sand, sea foam, and salt. Wind and sun. Maybe he was made of the things he loved best.”
― Meg Haston, The End of Our Story

“Can’t she read my intentions in my jutted angles, see the end goal in my glassy, dead eyes?”
― Meg Haston, Paperweight

“I couldn’t stand the thought of Dad standing there in the dark.”
― Meg Haston, Paperweight