Lucy A. Snyder > Quotes

“I know I'm immature in some ways, but inside me there's a cranky old lady yelling at the damn kids to get off her lawn. She's been there awhile. I've decided to call her Mabel.”
― Lucy Snyder, Spellbent

“So, um, where's your broomstick?" he countered, his face turning pink from his effort at not laughing.

"Broomsticks are *sooo* 1695," I replied, rolling my eye. "Modern witches use vibrators and drop acid just like everyone else."

"What?" He frowned, looking confused.

"Yeah, *flying on broomsticks* equals a big-ass euphemism for pagan women getting their freak on with broom handles greased up with morning glory butter," I said. "Sometimes strychnine. Not a good idea, but hey, back in the day they used to think a wolf's testicle wrapped in a greasy rag was a good barrier contraceptive. So, yeah, no broomsticks for me. But thanks *ever* so much for asking about my sex life when we've only just met.”
― Lucy Snyder, Spellbent

“Cooper can be pretty fierce when he gets angry. To me, that's one of his sexiest traits. It's not just about being able to tear the house down; it's about being willing to do it in a heartbeat to protect the people who genuinely need your help.”
― Lucy Snyder, Spellbent

“You have any idea what time it is?" I asked.

"I'm afraid not," he replied.

"Oh well. I'll take a wild guess and set the time to eight PM, and set the alarm to go off at around midnight. And then, potions, with a quick break to go dump my anathema again! And then, we're off to see the Warlock, and hopefully Lion will get his courage and Tin Man will get his heart and I will get my Cooper.”
― Lucy Snyder, Spellbent

“I was a vegetarian of sorts," he replied, "but the difference between animal and vegetable isn't as clearly defined on my home world as it is here."

"How do you mean?" I asked.

"Our plants can get out of the soil and move to a new location if they don't like where they're growing. Some of them are sentient. I tried not to eat those sorts of plants" he replied.

"Oh. Well, I'm sure they found that very thoughtful of you," I replied.”
― Lucy Snyder, Spellbent

“Have you lost all faith?” “Yes,” she whispered. “Good,” he replied. “Then I have one last task for you. I’ve been to that planet of yours, and I think I’d like it best if the only sounds were the wind in the dead trees and the waves crashing upon empty shores.”
― Lucy A. Snyder, In the Court of the Yellow King

“You did express a disinterest in involving *nice* people in our current difficulties,” Pal reminded me.

True enough, I thought back. Hallelujah, it’s raining jerks.”
― Lucy Snyder, Spellbent

“The DJ stopped the music and turned on the stage lights. Zatanna stepped up and approached the microphone.
"And here's our special musical guests tonight, direct from Innsmouth," she announced. "The Esoteric Order of Dagon Choir! Let's all given them a hand!”
― Lucy A. Snyder, Halloween Season

“What kind of nihilistic fuckclowns firebombed their own city and worshipped a big jiggly sonic death Santa that wanted to apocalyze the whole planet?”
― Lucy A. Snyder, Halloween Season

“Did I even ever really want kids? Did I, honestly? Even if it was possible or prudent after PVG’s ravages, did I want to destroy my damaged body even more in pregnancy for the sake of small strangers I’d be responsible for? Responsible for literally decades? An endlessly stressful responsibility that, if I failed to do it well, would result in exactly the same kind of distant relationship I’d had with my own family, so that I’d inevitably die alone and dissatisfied, no matter what future I’d envisioned?”
― Lucy A. Snyder, Sister, Maiden, Monster

“Give me another bowl. Two bowls.

Unfortunately, she can't bring you more.

Dr. Sallows voice was very even, but I caught just a hint of a fearful tremor. I looked up at him. Really looked at him. His pupils were constricted to small dark points. A single bead of sweat trickled from his tidy grey hairline down his golf tanned forehead. He was afraid. I knew it deep in my bones.

A man is only afraid of a woman if she has power.

I slid my gaze to Darius. His face was an impassive mask behind his mask, but his fists were clutched at his sides. He was afraid too.

And that realization made me feel absolutely exhilarated.”
― Lucy A. Snyder, Sister, Maiden, Monster

“I'd been in the van for more than a few seconds, and my body was convinced that Betty was an absolute, entire snack.”
― Lucy A. Snyder, Sister, Maiden, Monster

“Wouldn't it be great to be absolutely certain that Jesus, or someone like him, was real? To pray and know, deep in your heart, that you were forging an eternal intimate relationship with the endlessly loving, endlessly forgiving, tender, and merciful son of God? To know that if you repented your earthly mistakes and took him into your heart, he would make sure that everything worked out ok in the end? But even if you suffered and died, he would take you into his strong, gentle arms, and you would live on and on in his love and understanding? That you were part of a great and wonderful thing, and your life on this earth among billions of other souls served a unique, divine purpose? Wouldn't that kind of faith, that kind of certainty, be such an incredible comfort to someone in my situation? Wouldn't it be such a relief to just let Jesus take the wheel? It sounded really, really great. But I knew that, like all other things that seemed far too good to be true, Jesus was mostly a comforting myth.”
― Lucy A. Snyder