Amber Smith > Quotes

“He's not the hero and he's not the enemy and he's not a god. He's just a boy. And I'm just a girl, a girl who needs to pick up her own pieces and put them back together herself.”
― Amber Smith, The Way I Used to Be

“I hate that just because you happen to be good at something,people automatically think that's what makes you happy,but it's not really like that, you know? It's not that simple.”
― Amber Smith, The Way I Used to Be

“All you have to do is act like you’re normal and okay, and people start treating you that way.”
― Amber Smith, The Way I Used to Be

“Maybe He'll get what he deserves. Maybe Not. Maybe I'll never find it in my heart to forgive him. And maybe there's nothing wrong with that,either. All those maybes swimming around my head make me think that "maybe" could just be another word for hope.”
― Amber Smith, The Way I Used to Be

“And I’m terrified he’ll see through the tough iceberg layer, and he’ll discover not a soft, sweet girl, but an ugly fucking disaster underneath.”
― Amber Smith, The Way I Used to Be

“. And I really wonder how people get to be normal like this. How they just seem to know what to say and do, automatically.”
― Amber Smith, The Way I Used to Be

“I can hear him breathing on the other side of the door,breathing oddly,like,unevenly. But,no,it's not him just breathing,I realize slowly. He's crying. And I kneel there on the other side of the door that might as well be the other side of the galaxy,feeling so empty,so dead inside.”
― Amber Smith, The Way I Used to Be

“Because, in my heart, I know, I’m not who he thinks I am. Not even close. And he’s not who I want him to be, either.”
― Amber Smith, The Way I Used to Be

“Why do I feel like, sometimes, I have no one in the entire world who knows me in even the slightest, most insignificant way?”
― Amber Smith, The Way I Used to Be

“I think you love the person you knew back then, the person you believe I can become again one day. But that’s not the same as loving me the way I am now.”
― Amber Smith, The Way I Am Now

“I think about how they say when most people get into car accidents, it's less than one mile from their home. Maybe that's because everything's so familiar, you stop paying attention. You don't notice the one thing that's different or wrong or off or dangerous. And I think about how maybe that's what just happened to me. (page 10)”
― Amber Smith, The Way I Used to Be

“I watch as his body melts down to the floor and I start to understand something too. That this isn't all about me. This thing, it touches everyone. (page 359)”
― Amber Smith, The Way I Used to Be

“But I'm not her anymore. I don't even want to be her anymore. That girl who was so naive and stupid -- the kind of girl who could let something like this happen to her. (page 7)”
― Amber Smith, The Way I Used to Be

“Her laugh is a drug.”
― Amber Smith, The Way I Am Now

“This isn’t who I was supposed to be. I used to be so nice. I used to be a nice, sweet, good person. And now I just—I just—I hate.”
― Amber Smith, The Way I Used to Be

“I’m just saying you can stop carrying this weird torch you have for her. You’re gonna set yourself on fire with it.”
― Amber Smith, The Way I Am Now

“ROOM WITHOUT BOOKS IS LIKE A BODY WITHOUT A SOUL—CICERO.”
― Amber Smith, The Way I Used to Be

“jack-o’-lantern. You know?” “Okay,” he says, nodding. “Like someone drew a face on me and carved it into my skin. Scooped out my insides. Just hollowed out, everything scraped clean. And then lit a fire in me and left me out in the cold. And I just…”
― Amber Smith, The Way I Am Now

“He has no way of knowing how sometimes it physically hurts to smile. How a smile can sometimes feel like the biggest lie I’ve ever told.”
― Amber Smith, The Way I Used to Be

“My body is a torture chamber. It's a fucking crime scene. Hideous things have happened here. (page 109)”
― Amber Smith, The Way I Used to Be

“Everyone would rather just believe the lies and not see all the damage he's done. And it's not fair that people can just get away with doing these awful things and never have to pay the consequences. (page 29)”
― Amber Smith, The Way I Used to Be

“Sometime' -- I'm not sure if I should say something this terrible out loud -- 'sometimes, I don't think I believe in God.' Because what kind of God lets bad things happen to people who so desperately try to be good? (page 129)”
― Amber Smith, The Way I Used to Be

“I hate him so much that sometimes, that' -- gasp, gasp, gasp. 'Sometimes I can't feel anything else at all. Just hate' -- gasp -- 'hate, that's all, that's everything. My whole life is just hate.' (page 346)”
― Amber Smith, The Way I Used to Be

“Try to ignore all the things that didn’t feel right, all the things that felt like they would never feel right again.”
― Amber Smith, The Way I Used to Be

“I want to get as far away from the past as possible, be as different from that girl as I can.”
― Amber Smith, The Way I Used to Be

“I’m so far gone now, sometimes I feel like maybe it’s almost enough. Because, honestly, there isn’t the slightest trace left of that frizzy-haired, freckle-faced, clarinet-playing, scared-silent little girl. And her big secret is really not such a huge deal anymore. It was all so long ago now, it practically never even happened.”
― Amber Smith, The Way I Used to Be

“And I really wonder how people get to be normal like this. How they just seem to know what to say and do, automatically.”
― Amber Smith, The Way I Used to Be

“Especially when you just got attacked in your own house -- in your own bed -- and you can't even stand up for yourself there, either, the one place you're supposed to be safe. (page 22)”
― Amber Smith, The Way I Used to Be

“Empty, haunted -- this house. Not by ghosts, but by us, by our own history, by the things that have happened here. (page 238)”
― Amber Smith, The Way I Used to Be

“I don’t even feel like I’m the same person anymore. Back then I felt like I had no choice but to accept whatever kind of affection was offered to me even if it wasn’t what I wanted or needed. But maybe we can only accept the love we think we deserve.”
― Amber Smith, The Way I Am Now