Jennifer Schneider

“4.Grief/Ambivalence: This is where you experience the full emotional impact of what has happened, especially intense pain, hopelessness, grief, rejection, and loss of your relationship as you thought it was. You also experience ambivalence about the relationship, because you start to develop self-awareness and to consider your own needs and desires rather than focusing on your partner.       5.Repair: In this period, which may take years to reach, you concentrate on your personal growth. You may revisit and come to more peace about negative childhood experiences and how they may have influenced your choices and decisions in your relationship. You develop your spirituality.”
― Jennifer Schneider, Back From Betrayal: Recovering from the Trauma of Infidelity

“How do we go about this? Forgiveness is a slow process that may take years. It involves several steps, the first of which is to recognize that a wrong has been done to us. As people accustomed to denying our own feelings, making excuses for our partner’s hurtful actions, and taking responsibility when things go wrong, we may not find this easy. We need to acknowledge that our spouse’s behavior was inexcusable, that he or she behaved in ways that caused us a great deal of pain.”
― Jennifer Schneider, Back From Betrayal: Recovering from the Trauma of Infidelity