Catherine McTamaney

“As adults, we can turn our own deaf ears and think of infants as playthings. We can stuff pacifiers into mouths when they distract us. We can close doors on cries when they keep us awake. We can play with our children when it is convenient. We can push them in their strollers, carrying them only when they need to move from one contraption to another, and focus instead on how cute their clothes are. The infant will learn. She will learn that mouths can be used to satisfy emotional needs. She will learn that parents’ ears are sometimes unresponsive, even to the most anguished cries. She will learn that touch is for efficiency. She will learn that appearance outweighs experience. Or as adults, we can listen to our infants, pay attention to the things that grab their focus, let them turn their heads away in satisfaction before we move them along. We can listen to their cries as expressions of real need: of hunger, thirst, frustration, loneliness. We can carry them in our arms instead of pushing them in their vehicles. The infant will learn. She will learn that the world is worth slowing down to attend to. She will learn that parents respond, that even when they solve the problem, she does not have to suffer alone. She will learn that touching shows love. She will learn that the process is more important than the time frame.”
― Catherine McTamaney Ed.D., The Tao of Montessori: Reflections on Compassionate Teaching