Nan Wise

“Anxious or preoccupied attachment shows up as, “my relationships aren’t safe and secure.” “I need my connections to be okay in order for me to be okay.” Such a setup often means that women and men will choose the needs of the relationship or partner over the self—a style that results in a person not standing up for their own needs. Learning how to voice your own needs is an important feature of healthy relationships. On the contrary, developing habits for relationship success involves learning that not taking a stand for ourselves is as much of a relationship offense and often, over the long run, as destructive as the more dramatic offenses of lying and cheating.”
― Nan Wise, Why Good Sex Matters: Understanding the Neuroscience of Pleasure for a Smarter, Happier, and More Purpose-Filled Life

“To put it simply: the violation of our expectations, for better or worse, are often the source of our emotional reactions.”
― Nan Wise, Why Good Sex Matters: Understanding the Neuroscience of Pleasure for a Smarter, Happier, and More Purpose-Filled Life