Kristen Gardner

“Sometimes it’s easy to say, ‘Yes! I want Christ to enter in me.’ But this doesn’t occur in five minutes. You can’t just go in front of the Tabernacle and say, ‘Now!’ and it’s done and over with. And He’s there inside you. In my experience, it’s a fairly painful process. In order for Christ to live in me, in order for Him to dwell inside and take complete possession of my soul, He has to step on and crush the serpent, the old nature,[106] my ego of Clare Crockett. This hurts a lot, a lot; sometimes, a ton. He has to ‘get rid of’ everything that isn’t Him—and there’s a lot, by the way! And sometimes my despicable self runs after things that He is trying to rid my soul of: my will, my likes, my attachments, my ideas, my plans… and that hurts, even though I know it’s for my own good. It stings! It doesn’t mean that when I say, ‘Let me die so you can live!’, I’m just kidding! No! I’m serious when I say it, but please give me your strength, your grace, your love, your saints, your mother, your heart… so I can lose all fear. So I can ‘open wide the doors’ to you.”[107]”
― Kristen Gardner, Sr. Clare Crockett: Alone with Christ Alone