Jill Gutowitz

“I’ve spent more than a decade examining why I feel this insatiable need for attention and external gratification, to make people laugh, to feel seen and noticed and understood; trying to make sense of why nothing I ever do or say or create feels good enough without a financial reward or widespread appreciation, things I’ve tied to my own self-worth, which I can’t seem to untether. But how can I? Once you tie anything to survival, especially in those adolescent years, untangling that knot is tough stuff.”
― Jill Gutowitz, Girls Can Kiss Now: Essays

“Recently, I’ve discovered something troubling about myself, that it’s the wanting that I actually yearn for. The only exciting part of life is the part where the Thing hasn’t happened yet, where I’m still chasing it. When we want something, we’re living in a fantasy of having that thing—whether that’s a person, success, a new job, whatever—”
― Jill Gutowitz, Girls Can Kiss Now: Essays