7 awkward things I'll probably do at my book signing today
1. Write “Sorry I’m not John Green, haha!” in someone’s perfectly adequate Jay Clark book.
2. Get Starbucks on someone’s book and then pretend it’s on purpose because of all the Starbucks references in Finding Mr. Brightside.
3. Remember that Importance of Eye Contact article I read once on a terrible website — Forbes.com, maybe? — and then stare aggressively into the irises of an innocent customer.
4. Draw a smiley face that doesn’t look very happy and then overcompensate by giving it hair, ears, and an inappropriate tongue, all the while wishing I could delete it. :/
5. Mistake a browsing customer for a fan — “Hey, you, thanks for coming!!!” — and force them to take a selfie with me.
6. Secretly consume a Clif Bar like an up-to-no-good hyena between social interactions because I didn’t eat enough for lunch.
7. Get Clif Bar chocolate on my pants and try to dab it away using the watery sweat from my Starbucks cup.
2. Get Starbucks on someone’s book and then pretend it’s on purpose because of all the Starbucks references in Finding Mr. Brightside.
3. Remember that Importance of Eye Contact article I read once on a terrible website — Forbes.com, maybe? — and then stare aggressively into the irises of an innocent customer.
4. Draw a smiley face that doesn’t look very happy and then overcompensate by giving it hair, ears, and an inappropriate tongue, all the while wishing I could delete it. :/
5. Mistake a browsing customer for a fan — “Hey, you, thanks for coming!!!” — and force them to take a selfie with me.
6. Secretly consume a Clif Bar like an up-to-no-good hyena between social interactions because I didn’t eat enough for lunch.
7. Get Clif Bar chocolate on my pants and try to dab it away using the watery sweat from my Starbucks cup.
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message 1:
by
Laura
(new)
Jun 11, 2016 09:57AM
Pretty funny! Eye contact is way important. I can remember every author/ illustrator at a signing who ignored me to talk to his handler, rep. etc. Big mistake! lol One of my duties was to select books for the northeast region of the country for a chain store. Also, don't spill your Starbucks on someone's book! That's never cool.
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This was just what I needed right now, this is hilarious. xD I can't wait to read Finding Mr. Brightside! If just your blog posts are this charming, I can't wait to get to know the characters in your book.
Jay wrote: "Laura wrote: "Pretty funny! Eye contact is way important. I can remember every author/ illustrator at a signing who ignored me to talk to his handler, rep. etc. Big mistake! lol One of my duties wa..."Wonderful! Glad to hear it!
Jay wrote: "Theresa wrote: "This was just what I needed right now, this is hilarious. xD I can't wait to read Finding Mr. Brightside! If just your blog posts are this charming, I can't wait to get to know the..."
That sounds like a pretty fair deal to me! :P
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