This year has been hard, no doubt. The pandemic has brought the world to its knees and we're going to be down here for a while. We're all struggling with so much change in our lives. Our country is dealing with a Covidiot in the oval office, wildfires that are burning homes, towns, people, animals, and protests are happening all over to bring about much needed change. It's overwhelming. With so much death and destruction, how am I supposed to write?

Deadlines are hard, but for me, writing during a pandemic is almost impossible. Meghan O'Brien posted on FB how she can barely string a sentence together because she feels broken. I couldn't have said it better. I'm broken.

I like to write about the happily ever afters, but it's hard to see the light at the end of the dark tunnel. I'm doing everything I'm supposed to - staying home, wearing a mask, and social distancing. When was the last time I was hugged? If you know me, I'm a hugger. I will hug strangers. Human contact is so important to your mood. Hugs knock down all walls. How many times have you cried either tears of joy, or sorrow just from a hug? They are needed and necessary for us to cope with life. Now we can't even hug because we could possibly be spreading a virus that could kill us or our loved ones.

I know I have a job to do, but even I have breakdown moments. I know that writing books helps so many people out there escape from this hot mess of a pandemic we are in. I have to meet my deadlines even though I'm struggling inside. I'm teetering on the brink of darkness and I really hope I can stay focused because writing will help me. Your comments and reviews are uplifting and make me smile throughout the day. They give me hope. Writers spend a lot of free time creating stories because we know our community needs a voice. We don't get rich from writing. It's a passion we share and we want representation for generations to read. This is an important time for the LGBTQ community. I plan on sticking with it, but just know I'm struggling with you, but trying my best to move forward in a positive light.