Janice’s Comments (group member since Aug 07, 2013)

Janice’s comments from the Rhyming Poets Annonymous group.

Thank you, Pan. I sooo understand. Feel free to stop in here if/when time allows. Meanwhile, see you in the World of Poets group.

Love, Janice

I enjoyed reading this direct assault on Bitterness, which you beautifully personified. You didn't wallow in the elements of Bitterness, but rather capitalized on your intense struggle with it.

Would you consider, tho, replacing "capture" with "seize" in your 5th line? It would even out your meter there, I think. Just a thought.

You lead in directly, fight a good fight, and then end this poem with a strong, dynamic resolution. Nicely done!

Since this group is still new, hence a bit sparse, I will be posting more of my rhyming verses while I wait to see your additions. Here is an excerpt from my book - Echoes, Neo-Victorian Poetry:

Twist

A slender man ignores the damp,
That permeates an upper room,
With not but an old oil lamp
To keep at bay the London gloom.

His fixed intent and form are bent
Upon the timepiece in his hand.
Small tools he plies to this device
With more than skill at his command.

Soon comes a sigh to signify
That his repairs are now complete
He notes the face but not the time
And takes another sip of tea.

Thank you Bonnie. Welcome to this group! I'll be posting more rhyming verse soon. Feel free to do likewise, again, as you explore writing in rhyme. Thanks for the rhyming accolade!

~Janice T~

I thought I'd kick this group off with a poem that I wrote in answer to a "why rhyme?" query.

Q & A on Rules

Q:
Oh, Classic Verse, it seems a curse
Has long consumed your heart
With rules on rhyme and time, and worse:
To confiscate your art.
Why bow you so to what you know
To be but a cheap device?
Let thoughts unfold, be uncontrolled,
And fluid form suffice.

A:
Ah, but you see, in verse I'm free
To work within the lines
Which censor ambiguity
And elevate my rhymes
To rhythmed regularity
In balanced, toned array
So I can treat upon the meat
Of what I want to say.

Janice T