Amy’s Comments (group member since Nov 15, 2024)

Amy’s comments from the Read BTS group.

Almond by Sohn Won-Pyung, Joosun Lee (Translator)

This story is, in short, about a monster meeting another monster.

One of the monsters is me.

Yunjae was born with a brain condition called Alexithymia that makes it hard for him to feel emotions like fear or anger. He does not have friends—the two almond-shaped neurons located deep in his brain have seen to that—but his devoted mother and grandmother aren’t fazed by his condition. Their little home above his mother’s used bookstore is decorated with colorful post-it notes that remind him when to smile, when to say "thank you," and when to laugh. Yunjae grows up content, even happy, with his small family in this quiet, peaceful space.

Then on Christmas Eve—Yunjae’s sixteenth birthday—everything changes. A shocking act of random violence shatters his world, leaving him alone and on his own. Struggling to cope with his loss, Yunjae retreats into silent isolation, until troubled teenager Gon arrives at his school and begins to bully Yunjae.

Against all odds, tormentor and victim learn they have more in common than they realized. Gon is stumped by Yunjae’s impassive calm, while Yunjae thinks if he gets to know the hotheaded Gon, he might learn how to experience true feelings. Drawn by curiosity, the two strike up a surprising friendship. As Yunjae begins to open his life to new people—including a girl at school—something slowly changes inside him. And when Gon suddenly finds his life in danger, it is Yunjae who will step outside of every comfort zone he has created to perhaps become a most unlikely hero.

The Emissary meets The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime in this poignant and triumphant story about how love, friendship, and persistence can change a life forever.

Thanks! I've gone ahead and added it to our bookshelf for future reading.

Discussion Questions:

1. What were your initial impressions of the book? Did your feelings change as you continued reading?

2. What did you think of the author's voice and writing style?

3. In an email to The Sunday Times, Baek shares, “I was thinking of planning my own death, but I got hungry and ate tteokbokki. I felt guilty thinking that I could still eat tteokbokki when I wanted to die, yet it felt like such a natural thing to do.” What does the title "I Want to Die but I Want to Eat Tteokbokki" reveal about the author's state of mind?

4. What is your go-to comfort food?

5. Does the reference to tteokbokki remind you of any experiences in your own life where you've used a tangible thing to ground yourself?

6. The book is described as both a memoir and a self-help book. In what ways does it fulfill both roles?

7. What did you think of the structure of the book (alternating between therapy sessions and reflections)?

8. What were your thoughts on the therapist's approach?

9. Did the book give you any insights into the process of therapy in South Korea? How does this process differ from what you have experienced in your own country?

10. Do you think the book accurately portrays the experience of being in therapy?

11. How does the book explore the relationship between physical needs (like eating) and emotional or mental states?

12. The book delves into the author's struggles with depression and anxiety. Did any specific passages about these struggles resonate with you?

13. What role does therapy play in the author's journey towards self-acceptance?

14. The book explores the author's relationship with herself and with others. How did these relationships impact her mental health?

15. Did the book change your perception of what it means to be "normal" or "healthy"?

16. Are there any specific scenes or dialogues that stood out to you?

17. How did the book make you reflect on your own life and experiences?

18. Did you find any parts of the book particularly relatable or triggering?

19. What other books about mental health have you read? How does this one compare?

20. Did you find yourself wanting to learn more about the author's life beyond the book?

21. Did this book make you want to try tteokbokki?

22. Would you recommend this book to others? Why or why not?

Okay, with BTS' return, I'm finally ready to get this started. I'll have discussion questions up soon so we can discuss the book in July and we'll have a new book in August.

I Want to Die But I Want to Eat Tteokpokki by Baek Se-hee, Hyacinta Louisa (Translator)

The South Korean runaway bestseller, debut author Baek Sehee's intimate therapy memoir, as recommended by BTS.

PSYCHIATRIST: So how can I help you?

ME: I don't know, I'm – what's the word – depressed? Do I have to go into detail?

Baek Sehee is a successful young social media director at a publishing house when she begins seeing a psychiatrist about her - what to call it? - depression? She feels persistently low, anxious, endlessly self-doubting, but also highly judgmental of others. She hides her feelings well at work and with friends, performing the calmness her lifestyle demands. The effort is exhausting, overwhelming, and keeps her from forming deep relationships. This can't be normal. But if she's so hopeless, why can she always summon a yen for her favorite street food: the hot, spicy rice cake, tteokbokki? Is this just what life is like?

Recording her dialogues with her psychiatrist over a twelve-week period, and expanding on each session with her own reflective micro-essays, Baek begins to disentangle the feedback loops, knee-jerk reactions, and harmful behaviors that keep her locked in a cycle of self-abuse. Part memoir, part self-help book, I Want to Die but I Want to Eat Tteokbokki is a book to keep close and to reach for in times of darkness. It will appeal to anyone who has ever felt alone or unjustified in their everyday despair.