Jenni’s Comments (group member since Aug 21, 2017)

Jenni’s comments from the Life Without Ed® (with Jenni!) group.

Sara wrote: "Hi Rachel, I agree - hearing from people who went through it is more believable than a therapist telling you the theory.

I don't think I could cope with 6 months of feeling sick.

I have had the E..."

If you guys are looking for eating disorder experts, try to find someone with the credential CEDS behind their name. This stands for Certified Eating Disorders Specialist, which means they have done lots of extra work and know the illness well. Here is a link: http://www.iaedp.com/certification-ov... Dietitians have the credential CEDRD. Other helpful things to ask when trying to find providers are:

How long have you been treating eating disorders?

What percentage of your clients have eating disorders?

To find a provider:

Academy for Eating Disorders: https://www.aedweb.org/network/member...

National Eating Disorders Association:
https://www.nationaleatingdisorders.o...

Support is such a key. Thanks for all of these great comments.

BTW: I deleted some triggering posts (reported to me by others). Let's try not to focus on eating disorder behaviors, nor over-focus on names of specific foods. (Ed thrives on that!) All of our bodies are different and need different fuel. Again, that is why experts are key!

Sadly, I accidentally deleted some posts by mistake. So sorry about that. Technical troubles. :)

Thanks for being so supportive of one another. You are all the best! I love the authenticity and sense of connection.

Heidi wrote: "Hi Sara,
I struggle with the not feeling hungry. I'm also extremely picky when it comes to what I'll eat. If you are able to find a dietitian who specializes in EDs and vegetarianism that might be ..."

YES! A dietitian and therapist are key. Thanks for pointing that out, Heidi.

I learned to eat anyway (even if I didn't feel hungry). For so long, I lost my internal cues regarding hunger. It took awhile to get those cues back. Today, I can truly feel when I am hungry, and the cool thing is: I love it! It is refreshing to be connected to my body. (This took years of work, of course.)

Hang in there. You got this!

Thanks for bringing up body image struggles. Yes, in my experience (and that of many), negative body image is the last to go. For me, negative body image was the first part of my eating disorder to come along, at age four! In my recovery, time and patience were key with negative body image. For some of us, our bodies change more quickly than our brains. We must give our brains time to rewire, and they will. I have learned to appreciate what my body DOES and not think so much about what it looks like. Today, my body is about to take me on a short hike, before a presentation in NC tonight.

Here are some articles that might help with negative body image:

A Thigh of Relief (excerpt from Goodbye Ed, Hello Me: Recover from Your Eating Disorder and Fall in Love with Life: https://jennischaefer.com/wp-content/...

You Can't Hate Yourself Thin: https://jennischaefer.com/blog/eating...

Fat Talk, Body Image, and Eating Disorders: https://www.eatingrecoverycenter.com/...

Excellent books are:





I hope this helps! Hang in there. This, too, gets better.

Michelle wrote: "Hi Melody, when I have sleep problems putting good quality lavender oil on the soles of my feet helps a ton. If this isn’t enough I listen to a pod cast. My sleep Dr said the worst thing I can do i..."

Dear Michelle - I am so sorry that you are struggling but glad to know that you have realized it...and most importantly, that you are focusing your efforts on getting back on track. Recovery IS a lot of work, like you said. And, it is worth it.

Melody wrote: "Hey all,

I've been having a really tough time dealing with flashbacks from abuse in my past. How do others of you make it through the flashbacks? How do you contain them? I'm working at using pos..."
Hi Melody - I am so sorry to hear that you are struggling with flashbacks. You listed some super coping skills. Have you connected with your therapist about this?

In my PTSD recovery, awareness actually helped me a lot, in terms of flashbacks. Just being aware (when I could) that I was having a flashback (or re-experiencing, in general) was key. Then, it became important for me to realize that I was living life, at that moment, with my "PTSD glasses" on. Everything appeared horrible. It helped me to know that everything wasn't horrible, but the glasses just made it appear that way. A great book that might provide you with some insight is: The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma

Hang in there. You are so strong. You CAN do this, Melody.

Rachel wrote: "I haven’t been on here in a while so am trying to go through any topic I have notifications for that have been posted in and reading back basically to my last post. I’m trying to at least get an id..."

Glad to hear from you, Rachel! You nailed it: yes, PTSD sucks. AND, gratefully, healing is amazing. Life can come full circle in the most amazing ways. I can't believe it. Seriously, I really can't.

Jodi wrote: "So great to read about the wonderful things that others have found to be helpful in finding support in recovery.

Sorry I have kind of disappeared from the discussions. I had our first baby back in..."

Hi Jodi - Again, per my last comment, you are an inspiration. Getting the help that you need is such a great example to others. I am deeply sorry to know about your current struggles. Many of my friends have struggled in similar ways. They sought help--and got better. Stay strong. You got this.

Michelle wrote: "Jenni- thanks for recommending the book Eating Disorder Anonymous. I want to participate in support and forget about online meetings. I mah do a small study of a recovery related book with a gal I ..."

HI Michelle - Thanks for letting me know. That is so cool! I am very happy to know that you are connecting. (Ed hates that, BTW.) Good for you.

Jodi wrote: "For the last two years especially, I've had to "just eat" a lot. After getting married in April of 2015, my husband and I started trying to get pregnant. In the previous two years, I'd worked (succ..."

Wow, Jodi, thank you for sharing this...such a beautiful testimony to the power of recovery. Congratulations. Your daughter is very lucky to have you as a mom. You're an inspiration.

Michelle wrote: "Melody, thank you. Still having terrible emotions over the dog issue. I cry over everything. I don’t know how people can swallow when there’s a lump in the throat. I don’t even enjoy crafting. All ..."

I am deeply sorry to hear about your dog, Michelle. Please do your best to beef up your recovery support. In tough times, I always needed to add extra support beams to my recovery bridge, you might say. Sending much love and prayers.

Michelle wrote: "Shannon, if I didn’t see your post and respond earlier I apologize. I am very interested in any help and in your dog thing. I did participate in Jenni and Robyn’s live thing 2 days ago. Very good a..."

Hi Michelle - That is so cool about your wanting to participate in Soul Paws...an amazing program!

Have you ever read ? This book was written specifically for us. It is great. (I wish it had existed when I was sick.) Eating Disorders Anonymous also has free online meetings: https://jennischaefer.com/resources/ (Scroll down to free support!) Thanks again for participating here!

Melody wrote: "What do others of you do when dissociation kicks in and it's really hard to be in the present moment?"

Hi Melody - This is such a great topic! I found this article on The Mighty that might be helpful: https://themighty.com/2017/01/tips-fo... For me personally, mindfulness activities helped...like going on a mindful walk and specifically paying attention to one particular sense (like sound). Or, it helped me to look around the room and notice visual things like colors. Hope this helps! Thanks for asking such a helpful question.

Rachel wrote: "I want to go skydiving SO bad. Closest I got was my sister and her now-husband taking me to iFly a couple years ago. It was fun, but definitely not the same.

Unfortunately, I can’t afford it and m..."

Skydiving was on my bucket list, too! One day, I believe you will do it, Rachel. If you do, please post pics!

Rachel wrote: "“Don’t look back. You’re not going that way.”

“Just Keep Swimming...” (never fails that in my head I hear the whole thing in Dory’s voice.)

I’ve got more, but it’s 3am and if I start digging into..."

Love these, Rachel!

Shannon wrote: "Rachel wrote: "Definitely helpful. I figured I would be paying the same amount whether I went in or not and, if worse came to worse, leave early. We were able to rationally talk it through see thin..."

Thanks for helping out with the group, Shannon!

Michelle wrote: "Nice to meet you, Laura. My youngest sister shares your name. Women helping women in ed recovery is so needed. There’s a certain amount of burn out and I get why that is. I hope I get to a place of..."

Hey there, Michelle - Thanks for being so welcoming to others in the group! I am deeply sorry to hear that you are struggling a lot right now. Please hold onto hope. There is a lot in this group. If you need treatment resources, please email me: jenni.schaefer@eatingrecovery.com. Recovery really is possible!

Laura wrote: "Hi everyone,
My name is Laura. I live in Florida.
I have been in recovery from anorexia for about four years now. I am currently pursuing my master's degree in mental health counseling because I wa..."

Welcome, Laura! I love what you shared....beautiful. We are so happy to have you here!

Oh, Christina - I so relate to you. I am very sorry that you feel this way. I know that many of us have been in your shoes. Here are some resources:

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCspO... - The Facebook Live videos here might really help you.

https://jennischaefer.com/resources/ - Check out the free support like online and phone 12-step meetings. I have only listed ones that are known to be focused on the solution, not food. These meetings are positive, pro-recovery, and include lots of inspiration.

Get support...connect...connect...connect. That is how we heal. Do whatever it takes to get continued expert care. We believe in you. Please don't stop fighting. You have worked so hard. YOU are an inspiration.

Heidi wrote: "Jenni wrote: "Oooh, I love these, Heidi! Thank you! The one about wings especially hits home."

You're welcome. I thought of you when I saw the one about wings. I remembered you talking about takin..."

Yes, yes, I love talking about "jumping." I often compare recovery to skydiving. We take a leap of faith; we trust the parachute will open!

Heidi wrote: "I forgot about this thread, or maybe I just did not want to remember about it. The last time I posted to this thread was the day before Thanksgiving, when I was struggling with following my meal pl..."

Heidi - As I have said before, you are so strong and brave. Your vulnerability and authenticity are such gifts. You got this. We believe in you. Have beautiful holiday!