“harbored resentment over endings of which I had no control; resentment that occupied energy it didn’t deserve. I let every feeling—hurt, anger, and everything in between—run its course, then made joy a choice. In less mature chapters of my life, it would have been easier to allow tension to clog my spiritual pores than to try to understand my own role in my history’s patterns. But if we’re not decisive about boundaries that preserve our peace, we continue to be susceptible to unnecessary pain. The source of my peace came from studying and forgiving the experiences that robbed me of it. It came from rekindling flames in me that only I could ignite, if only I committed to relearning myself.”