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Louis de Bernières

“However, the Liberals and Conservatives differed over how to combat the spread of such appalling beliefs as “equality,” “fair pay,” and “democracy.” The Conservatives believed in coming down hard on them; this involved being curt with your campesinos, keeping them illiterate, and paying them a fixed wage of 150 pesos a week. The Liberals, on the other hand, believed in being jolly with your campesinos, teaching them to read bits of paper with instructions on them, and paying them a fixed wage of 150 pesos a week.”

Louis de Bernières, The War of Don Emmanuel's Nether Parts
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The War of Don Emmanuel's Nether Parts The War of Don Emmanuel's Nether Parts by Louis de Bernières
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