“The traumatised child learns that only it can protect itself. It must assume control, stay on high alert, scan the room, survive. These factory settings are not like the brightness of a picture or the volume of a television. These children are wired for danger and a few years in a loving home will not reset them. They need parenting in a different way, so that they can learn they are good and lovable, so that the shame of their early years is eased, so that they can experience calm and start to learn from new experiences.”