“If we could understand this fundamental intuition about the soul, that it is given raw, then we might forgive ourselves and oth-ers for not being quick to handle relationships with grace. We might see that many problems are not due to one person's mali-ciousness but to the law that soul stuff is given in unrefined lumps and requires a long process of sorting, shaping, refining, and even transmuting-all operations of the tradition of alchemy. A re-lationship problem may be like the piece of marble Michelangelo confronted with his hammer and chisel: the inner figure waiting to be sculpted out is not easy to perceive and is certainly invisible except to a poetic eye.”