“The initial intellect that created everything became a man and died, nailed to a wooden post some two thousand years ago, before briefly returning to human life and then transferring back to his ethereal state somewhere outside of the physical world. This anthropoid interlude for this creator deity (many billions of years after the start of the Universe) is believed to compensate for the bad behavior of those people who accept this story as real, thereby ensuring a pleasant continuation of consciousness after their physical body has ceased to be alive.”