“All parents must overcome fears in the process of sending their children out into the indifferent, sometimes perilous world. We assess the dangers for our kids when they're young, and begin giving them the skills to make their own assessments as they grow older, but when they hit their teenage years, the rules seem to blur. We become less trusting of our instincts and acquired parenting skills, moving uncertainly between the urge to protect them and the desire to let them blossom. Adolescence is a dislocating time for parents and children alike. Unlike babies, who come squalling into the world in need of everything, teenagers bounce uncomfortably, and often angrily between periods of adult-like self-sufficiency and childlike dependency. We as parents are equally as ill-equipped to handle the fluctuations. Some parents respond to inevitable clashes and the resentments that follow with avoidance, retreating from their teens. At the very moment they should engage, at the very moment their teenagers secretly want them to be involved in their lives, they pull back. I was determined not to do this.”