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“The best way to calibrate a question is to avoid verbs or words that illicit a yes-no answer, like "can" or "does".   Instead,  use reporter question words like "how " and "what"  for open-ended responses, but be very careful of "why" because it often leads to defensiveness.”

Brief Books, Summary of Never Split The Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On It by Chris Voss and Tahl Raz
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