David > David's Quotes

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  • #1
    Dean Martin
    “I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.”
    ― Dean Martin
    208 likes

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  • #2
    William W. Purkey
    “You've gotta dance like there's nobody watching,
    Love like you'll never be hurt,
    Sing like there's nobody listening,
    And live like it's heaven on earth.”
    ― William W. Purkey
    tags: dance, heaven, hurt, inspirational, life, love, sing
    128932 likes

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  • #3
    “Insanity is doing the same thing, over and over again, but expecting different results.”
    ― Narcotics Anonymous
    tags: humor, insanity, life, misattributed-ben-franklin, misattributed-mark-twain, misattributed-to-einstein
    64661 likes

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  • #4
    Margaret Mead
    “Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed, citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.”
    ― Margaret Mead
    tags: activism, attributed-no-source, change, inspirational, life, philosophy, world
    11483 likes

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  • #5
    May Sarton
    “We have to dare to be ourselves, however frightening or strange that self may prove to be.”
    ― May Sarton
    tags: authenticity, life, philosophy, self
    9087 likes

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  • #6
    Albert Einstein
    “Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.”
    ― Albert Einstein
    tags: attributed-no-source, human-nature, humor, infinity, philosophy, science, stupidity, universe
    148458 likes

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  • #7
    “Whenever I feel the need to exercise, I lie down until it goes away.”
    ― Paul Terry
    tags: exercise, humor, laziness, misattributed-to-hutchins
    24390 likes

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  • #8
    Groucho Marx
    “I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.”
    ― Groucho Marx
    tags: books, humor, reading, television
    23093 likes

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  • #9
    Garrison Keillor
    “Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car.”
    ― Garrison Keillor
    tags: humor, religion
    30253 likes

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  • #10
    Jon Stewart
    “If America leads a blessed life, then why did God put all of our oil under people who hate us?”
    ― Jon Stewart
    tags: absurd, good-questions
    307 likes

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  • #11
    Mark Twain
    “If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.”
    ― Mark Twain
    tags: lies, lying, memory, truth
    92204 likes

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  • #12
    “Women can fake an orgasm, but men can fake an entire relationship.”
    ― Sharon Stone
    tags: inspirational
    233 likes

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  • #13
    Thomas Szasz
    “Two wrongs don't make a right, but they make a good excuse.”
    ― Thomas Szasz
    tags: humor, inspirational
    9768 likes

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  • #14
    Rita Mae Brown
    “The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four people is suffering from a mental illness. Look at your 3 best friends. If they're ok, then it's you.”
    ― Rita Mae Brown
    tags: humor, insanity
    12678 likes

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  • #15
    “Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.”
    ― Anthony G. Oettinger
    tags: humor, misattributed-to-groucho-marx, time
    6194 likes

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  • #16
    Mark Twain
    “But who prays for Satan? Who, in eighteen centuries, has had the common humanity to pray for the one sinner that needed it most?”
    ― Mark Twain
    tags: humor-satan
    6211 likes

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  • #17
    Oscar Wilde
    “I think God, in creating man, somewhat overestimated his ability.”
    ― Oscar Wilde
    tags: creation, god, humor, man
    6378 likes

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  • #18
    Douglas Adams
    “I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don't know the answer”
    ― Douglas Adams
    tags: attributed-no-source, humor, misattributed-douglas-adams, wit
    11373 likes

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  • #19
    Robin Williams
    “See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time.”
    ― Robin Williams
    tags: humor, men
    2382 likes

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  • #20
    Steven Wright
    “Right now I’m having amnesia and déjà vu at the same time. I think I’ve forgotten this before.”
    ― Steven Wright
    tags: amnesia, humor, memory
    4691 likes

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  • #21
    George Carlin
    “The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.”
    ― George Carlin
    tags: humor, insanity, lies, lying, self-indulgence, truth
    19793 likes

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  • #22
    Eoin Colfer
    “If you were me, then I'd be you, and if I were you, then I'd hide somewhere far away.”
    ― Eoin Colfer, The Eternity Code
    tags: humor
    926 likes

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  • #23
    Douglas Coupland
    “TV and the Internet are good because they keep stupid people from spending too much time out in public.”
    ― Douglas Coupland, JPod
    tags: humor
    450 likes

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  • #24
    Jack Kerouac
    “The best teacher is experience and not through someone's distorted point of view”
    ― Jack Kerouac, On the Road
    1621 likes

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  • #25
    Jack Kerouac
    “I realized these were all the snapshots which our children would look at someday with wonder, thinking their parents had lived smooth, well-ordered lives and got up in the morning to walk proudly on the sidewalks of life, never dreaming the raggedy madness and riot of our actual lives, our actual night, the hell of it, the senseless emptiness.”
    ― Jack Kerouac, On the Road
    1176 likes

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  • #26
    Jack Kerouac
    “But, outside of being a sweet little girl, she was awfully dumb and capable of doing horrible things.”
    ― Jack Kerouac
    175 likes

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  • #27
    Jack Kerouac
    “A pain stabbed my heart, as it did every time I saw a girl I loved who was going the opposite direction in this too-big world.”
    ― Jack Kerouac, On the Road
    tags: life, parting
    1833 likes

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  • #28
    André Gide
    “It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not.”
    ― Andre Gide, Autumn Leaves
    tags: life, love
    62191 likes

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  • #29
    Jimi Hendrix
    “I'm the one that's got to die when it's time for me to die, so let me live my life the way I want to.”
    ― Jimi Hendrix, The Jimi Hendrix Experience - Axis: Bold as Love | Guitar TAB Sheet Music Collection | Note-for-Note Transcriptions for Electric Guitar Players | Classic Psychedelic Rock Solos
    tags: death, life
    17161 likes

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  • #30
    Tom Clancy
    “The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense.”
    ― Tom Clancy
    tags: life
    1996 likes



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Tags From David’s Quotes

dance
heaven
hurt
inspirational
life
love
sing
humor
insanity
misattributed-ben-franklin
misattributed-mark-twain
misattributed-to-einstein
activism
attributed-no-source
change
philosophy
world
authenticity
self
human-nature
infinity
science
stupidity
universe
exercise
laziness
misattributed-to-hutchins
books
reading
television
religion
absurd
good-questions
lies
lying
memory
truth
misattributed-to-groucho-marx
time
humor-satan
creation
god
man
misattributed-douglas-adams
wit
men
amnesia
self-indulgence
parting
death