Madbirder > Madbirder's Quotes

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#1

“Let me guess,” Thorne said. “Breaking and entering?”
After a long silence of examining the retracting mechanism, the girl wrinkled her nose. “Two counts of treason, if you must know. And resisting arrest, and unlawful use of bioelectricity. Oh, and illegal immigration, but honestly, I think that’s a little excessive.”
He squinted at the back of her head, a twitch developing in his left eye. “How old are you?”
“Sixteen.”
― Marissa Meyer, Scarlet

20 likes

#2

“Don’t come any closer!” Scarlet yelled. The chicken clucked and dawdled away. “I will shoot, you know.”
“I know.” A flicker of kindness passed over him and he pointed at his temple. “You’ll want to aim for the head. That usually makes for a fatal shot. Or, if you’re feeling shaky, the torso. It’s a larger target.”
“Your head looks pretty big from here.”
― Marissa Meyer, Scarlet

tags: humor, scarlet, wolf

35 likes

#3

“Let us find the dam snack bar," Zoe said. "We should eat while we can."
Grover cracked a smile. "The dam snack bar?"
Zoe blinked. "Yes. What is funny?"
"Nothing," Grover said, trying to keep a straight face. "I could use some dam french fries."
Even Thalia smiled at that. "And I need to use the dam restroom."
...
I started cracking up, and Thalia and Grover joined in, while Zoe just looked at me. "I do not understand."
"I want to use the dam water fountain," Grover said.
"And..." Thalia tried to catch her breath. "I want to buy a dam t-shirt.”
― Rick Riordan, The Titan’s Curse

tags: humor

9792 likes

#4

“Did you see any rice in there? Maybe we could fill Cinder's head with it."

Everyone stared at him.

"You know, to...absorb the moisture, or something. Isn't that a thing?"

"We're not putting rice in my head.”
― Marissa Meyer, Winter

758 likes

#5

“Thorne scoffed. “Careful is my middle name. Right after Suave and Daring.”
“Do you even know what you're saying half the time?” asked Cinder.”
― Marissa Meyer, Winter

tags: carswell-thorne, humour, lih-cinder

610 likes

#6

“One to be a murderer. One to be a Martyr. One to be a Monarch. One to go Mad”
― Marissa Meyer, Heartless

tags: catherine-pinkerton, death, jest, mad-hatter, prophecy, queen-of-hearts

502 likes

#7

“One cannot be brave who has no fear.”
― Marissa Meyer, Renegades

tags: marissa-meyer, renegades

605 likes

#8

“Do you remember me telling you we are practicing non-verbal spells, Potter?"
"Yes," said Harry stiffly.
"Yes, sir."
"There's no need to call me "sir" Professor."
The words had escaped him before he knew what he was saying.”
― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince

tags: humor, rebellion, sarcasm

15172 likes

#9

“What exactly are we looking for?

Villains, doing villainous things.”
― Marissa Meyer, Renegades

tags: heroes, villains, ya-fantasy

110 likes

#10

“Captain?"
"Yeah?"
"Do you think it was destiny that brought us together?"
He squinted and, after a thoughtful moment, shook his head. "No. I'm pretty sure it was Cinder.”
― Marissa Meyer, Cress

tags: cinder, cress, fate, lunar-chronicles, thorne

2007 likes

#11

“You’re only a first year!” Tina cried. “And you’re already getting death threats! Do you have any idea how lucky you are?”
― Stuart Gibbs, Spy Camp

73 likes

#12

“What?' said Oscar. 'You're not going to remark on all the mind-blowing things I can do?' Ruby gestured halfheartedly in Oscar's direction. 'Oscar can eat two extra-large pizzas in one sitting while quoting the entire third season of Star Avengers from memory.' Oscar nodded solemnly. 'It's hard to believe I even exist.”
― Marissa Meyer, Archenemies

tags: friendship, humor

28 likes

#13

“Adrian briefly closed his eyes. "It's alright, Winston. We're just trying-"

"No, it's not all right," said Oscar, slamming his fist on the table. "It's obvious you know something, and we're not leaving this room until you tell us what it is!"

Winston frowned. "They said we only had fifteen minutes."

"That-" started Oscar, holding up a finger. Then he deflated, clearing his throat. "- was actually true...”
― Marissa Meyer

tags: adrian, humor, nova, oscar, renegades, winston

11 likes

#14

“I don't want to be a man," said Jace. "I want to be an angst-ridden teenager who can't confront his own inner demons and takes it out verbally on other people instead."
"Well," said Luke, "you're doing a fantastic job.”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Ashes

tags: clary-fray, demons, growing-up, humor, jace-wayland, luke, teenager

12356 likes

#15

“Mom. I have something to tell you. I’m undead. Now, I know you may have some preconceived notions about the undead. I know you may not be comfortable with the idea of me being undead. But I’m here to tell you that undead are just like you and me … well, okay. Possibly more like me than you.”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Ashes

tags: city-of-ashes, humor, mortal-instruments, simon, vampire

4351 likes

#16

“I'll just have them change the entry in the demonology textbook from 'almost extinct' to 'not extinct enough for Alec. He prefers his monsters really, really extinct.' Will that make you happy?”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Ashes

tags: humor

3264 likes

#17

“Have you fallen in love with the wrong person yet?'
Jace said, "Unfortunately, Lady of the Haven, my one true love remains myself."
..."At least," she said, "you don't have to worry about rejection, Jace Wayland."
"Not necessarily. I turn myself down occasionally, just to keep it interesting.”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Bones

tags: city-of-bones, jace

24153 likes

#18

“I am a man" he told her, "and men do not consume pink beverages. Get thee gone woman, and bring me something brown.”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Glass

tags: brown, city-of-glass, clare, isabelle, jace

6998 likes

#19

“What kind of animal am I eating?'
Sam wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. 'It's named Saehrimnir.'
'Okay, first of all, who names their dinner? I don't want to know my dinner's name. This potato--is this potato named Steve?'
She rolled her eyes. 'No, stupid. That's Phil. The bread is Steve.”
― Rick Riordan, The Sword of Summer

225 likes

#20

“That awkward moment when you jump out a window because your friend jumped out a window, then you remember that your other friend can fly.”
― Rick Riordan, The Ship of the Dead

tags: funny, magnus-chase, samirah-al-abbas

108 likes

#21

“Annabeth frowned. "Percy's sword is a she?"
Jack laughed. "Well, duh."
Percy studied Riptide, though I could've told him from experience it was almost impossible to tell a sword's gender by looking at it.
"I don't know," he said. "Are you sure -?"
"Percy," said Alex. "Respect the gender."
"Okay, fine," he said. "It's just kinda strange that I never knew."
"On the other hand," Annabeth said, "you didn't know the pen could write until last year."
"That's low, Wise Girl.”
― Rick Riordan, The Ship of the Dead

tags: magnus-chase, percy-jackson

94 likes

#22

“In case you're wondering, Old York looks absolutely nothing like New York.
It looks older.
Magnus Chase, master of description. You're welcome.”
― Rick Riordan, The Ship of the Dead

tags: magnus-chase

90 likes

#23

“Isabelle!” Simon called. “Stop throwing clothes at me! Just because you’re a Shadowhunter and I’m a vampire doesn’t mean we can never happen. Our love is forbidden like the love of a shark and a—and a shark hunter. But that’s what makes it special.”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Heavenly Fire

tags: drunk-simon, simon-and-isabelle, sizzy

51 likes

#24

“My head feels round," Simon said sadly. "So round.”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Heavenly Fire

tags: simon-lewis

29 likes

#25

“In D&D, my first move, when you're dealing with an opposing army like that, would be to lure away a group of them-say five-and take their clothes."

"Is this so they have to go back to the fortress naked and their embarrassment will negatively affect morale?" Said Jace. "Because that seems complicated.”
― Cassandra Clare, City of Heavenly Fire

93 likes

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