Ben Christo > Ben's Quotes

“Look!" said Foaly, pointing with some urgency into the vast steel-gray gloom, "Someone who cares!”
― Eoin Colfer, The Atlantis Complex

“Orion:"Oh, how I pray that dragon will turn 'round so that I may smite it."
Foaly: "Smite it with what? Your secret birthmark?"
Orion: "Don't you mock my birthmark, which I may or may not have.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Atlantis Complex

“Can we please focus? We are supposed to be professionals." Holly said.

"Not me!" said Orion cheerily, "I'm just a Teenager with hormones running wild and may I say, young fairy lady, they're running wild in your direction.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Atlantis Complex

“Oh, I'm crazy all right. I do have plenty of psychoses. Multiple personality, delusional dementia, OCD. I've got them all, but most of all, I'm crazy about you.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Atlantis Complex

“Orion brightened. "I have an idea."

"Yes?" said Foaly, daring to hope that a spark of Artemis remained.

"Why don't we look for some magic stones that can grant wishes? Or, if that doesn't work, you could search my naked body for some mysterious birthmark that means I am actually the prince of somewhere or other.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Atlantis Complex

“I feel a little dizzy," said Orion. "But also wonderfully elated. I feel that I am on the verge of finding a rhyme for the word orange."

"Oxygen deprivation," said Foaly. "Or maybe it's just him.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Atlantis Complex

“How do I love thee? wondered Orion. "Let me see. I love thee passionately and eternally...obviously eternally-that goes without saying." Holly blinked sweat from her eyes. "Is he serious?" she called over her shoulder to Foaly. "Oh, absolutely," said the centaur "If he asks you to look for birthmarks, say no immediately." "Oh, I would never." Orion assured her. "Ladies don't look for birthmarks; that is work for jolly fellows like the Goodly Beast and myself. Ladies, like Miss Short, do enough by simply existing. They exude beauty, and that is enough." "I am not exuding anything." said Holly, through gritted teeth. Orion tapped her shoulder. "I beg to differ. You're exuding right now, a wonderful aura. It's pastel blue with little dolphins." Holly gripped the wheel tightly. "I'm going to be sick. Did he just say pastel blue?" "And dolphins, little ones," said Foaly.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Atlantis Complex

“So, what did you get for me?"
Angeline paused for a beat. "Jeans."
"What?" croaked Artemis.
"And a T-shirt.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Atlantis Complex

“Me," Artemis blurted. "I'm the nut."
Artemis could have sworn the squid winked at him before bringing the five-ton chunk of spacecraft swinging down toward the morsel of meat in its blue shell.
"I'm the nut!" Artemis shouted again, a little hysterically, it must be said.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Atlantis Complex

“You know, Miss Holly, you look very dramatic like that, backlit by the fire. Very attractive, if I may say so. I know you shared a moment passionne with Artemis which he subsequently fouled up with his typical boorish behavior. Let me just throw something out there for you to consider while we're chasing the probe: I share Artemis's passion but not his boorishness. No pressure; just think about it.
This was enough to elicit a deafening moment of silence even in the middle of a crisis, which Orion seemed to be blissfully unaffected by.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Atlantis Complex

“Orion sniffed. "Good. Then, worthy centaur, perhaps you could give me a ride to the village on your way back. Then I can make a few pennies wth my verses while you build us a shack and perform circus tricks for passersby."
This was such a surprising statement that Foaly briefly considered jumping into the hole to get away.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Atlantis Complex

“Very well, I promise. So, what did you get for me?" Angeline paused for a beat. "Jeans." "What?" croaked Artemis. "And a T-shirt" ...Artemis took several breaths. "Does the T-shirt have any writing on it?" A rustling of paper crackled through the phone's speakers. "Yes, it's so cool. There's a picture of a boy who for some reason has no neck and only three fingers on each hand, and behind him in this sort of graffiti style is the words RANDOMOSIY. I don't know what that means but it sounds really current." Randomosity though Artemis, and he felt like weeping.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Atlantis Complex

“Artemis: I am not buoyed by that.
Foaly: You are not supposed to be buoyed by that. You are supposed to be equalized.
Mulch: I'm pretty sure that both of you just made really horrible jokes. But I'm not sure because I think you broke my funny bone.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Atlantis Complex

“Quickly, Holly," said Artemis urgently. "Follow those bubbles."

Holly opened the throttle. "Now there's an order I never thought I'd hear from you.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Atlantis Complex

“So if you're not Artemis Fowl, then who are you?"

The boy extended a dripping hand straight up. "My name is Orion. I am so pleased to meet you at last. I am, of course, your servant."

Holly shook the proferred hand, thinking that manners were lovely, but she really needed someone cunning and ruthless right now, and this kid didn't appear to be very cunning.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Atlantis Complex

“And I will not be beaten by that jackass."

"Jackass?" said Foaly, wounded. "My favorite uncle is a jackass.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Atlantis Complex

“Butler snapped his fingers. "Focus, Artemis! Time enough for your Atlantis Complex later. We have the Atlantis Trench outside that door and six miles of water above it. If you want to stay alive, you need to stay alert." He turned to Holly. "This is ridiculous. I'm pulling the plug."

Holly's mouth was a tight line as she shook her head. "Navy rules, Butler. You're on my boat, you follow my orders."

"As I remember, I brought the boat."

"Yes, thanks for bringing my boat.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Atlantis Complex

“Ah, my princess. Noble steed. How does the morning find you both?”
― Eoin Colfer, The Atlantis Complex

“Is that how you're going to take me? Scare me into voluntarily coming aboard, then steal my Ice Cube?"

"It's always cubes with you," noted Foaly, somewhat randomly. "What's wrong with a nice sphere?”
― Eoin Colfer, The Atlantis Complex

“Vinyaya was being openly antagonistic, and that was an emotion that could be trusted, unless of course it was a bluff and the commander was a secret fan of his, unless it was a double bluff and she really did feel antagonistic.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Atlantis Complex

“Mulch's tongue lolled out, resting on the centaur's neck. "Mmm," he mumbled around his tongue. "Horse. Tasty"

"Let's go," said Foaly nervously. "Let's go right now.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Atlantis Complex

“A fifeteen-year old, of to save the world, with faries. - Angeline Fowl”
― Eoin Colfer, The Atlantis Complex

“This was a nightmare scenario for any bodyguard: stuck in the middle of a transparent tube, several miles underwater, with a murdering band of fugitives at one end and an enthralled but still highly skilled police officer at the other.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Atlantis Complex

“to be injured on this tundra would lead to a quick and painful death—or at the very least abject humiliation before the popping flashes of the tourist season's tail end, which was slightly less painful than a painful death, but lasted longer.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Atlantis Complex

“I'm not impressed”
― Eoin Colfer, Atlantiskompleksi

“Orion nodded, then asked, “Dwarf cheese?”
“Cheese made by dwarfs.”
“Oh,” said Orion, relieved. “They make it. It’s not actually . . .”
“No. What a horrible thought.”
“Exactly.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Atlantis Complex

“Either that boy is the sanest creature on Earth, he thought, or he is so disturbed that our tests cannot even begin to scratch the surface.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Last Guardian

“Onscreen, Foaly rubbed his eyelids with his index fingers.
"Yeah, yeah. Here we go. Captain Short goes rogue once more. Hands up who's surprised. Anyone?”
― Eoin Colfer, The Last Guardian

“Nobody's death is impending."
..."Well technically everyone's death is impending.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Last Guardian

“You don't understand!' Foaly objected.
Trouble cut him off with a chop of his hand through the air. 'I never understand. That's why we pay you and your dork posse."
Foaly objected again. 'They are not dorks!'
Trouble found space for yet another holster. 'Really? That guy brings a Beanie Baby to work every day. And your nephew, Mayne, speaks fluent Unicorn.'
'They're not all dorks,' said Foaly, correcting himself.”
― Eoin Colfer, The Last Guardian