Jason > Jason's Quotes

“Outside of a dog, a book is man’s best friend. Inside of a dog, it’s too dark to read.’—Groucho Marx.”
― Chris Grabenstein, Escape from Mr. Lemoncello's Library

“A library doesn't need windows, Andrew. We have books, which are windows into worlds we never even dreamed possible" -Dr. Zinchencko”
― Chris Grabenstein, Escape from Mr. Lemoncello's Library

“Knowledge not shared remains unknown”
― Chris Grabenstein, Escape from Mr. Lemoncello's Library

“A library is an arsenal of liberty.”
― Chris Grabenstein, Mr. Lemoncello's Library Olympics

“And maybe,” said Marjory, “we can find a few 641.8653 to go with it.” “Ooh,” said Andrew. “I love doughnuts.”
― Chris Grabenstein, Mr. Lemoncello's Library Olympics

“Google can bring you back one hundred thousand answers. A librarian can bring you back the right one.’ —Neil Gaiman”
― Chris Grabenstein, Mr. Lemoncello's Library Olympics

“Refreshments Shall Be Served,
Including Cherry Cordials.
-------------------
And There WILL Be Balloons.

Regards,
Luigi L. Lemonchello”
― Chris Grabenstein, Mr. Lemoncello's Library Olympics

“Corpus Bones! I utterly loathe my life.”
― Karen Cushman, Catherine, Called Birdy

“I watched the early morning light pass over and through the windows of colored glass, leaving streaks of red and green and yellow on the stone floor. When I was little, I used to try and capture the colored light. I thought I could hold it in my hand and carry it home. Now I know it is like happiness-- it is there or it is not, you cannot hold it or keep it.”
― Karen Cushman, Catherine, Called Birdy

“I am near fourteen and have never yet seen a hanging. My life is barren.”
― Karen Cushman, Catherine, Called Birdy

“I have developed a rash on my body where the rough cloth rubs on my skin. I wanted to take a bath, thinking that the dirt on my skin made the rash worse, but the bathing tub has been turned upside down and is being used as an extra table in the kitchen and i cannot have it until spring, so I just spread goose grease on my rash. The dogs are following me everywhere.”
― Karen Cushman, Catherine, Called Birdy

“I cannot be a monk, nor a crusader, nor a tumbler. I must stay here and hem sheets until I die. My humors are greatly out of balance. I prescribe for myself wormwood and spiced wine and some of the custard left from supper, and I will let all of the dogs sleep in my bed.”
― Karen Cushman, Catherine, Called Birdy

“More lady-lessons. It is impossible to do all and be all a lady must be and not tie oneself in a knot. A lady must walk erect with dignity, looking straight before her with eyelids low, gazing at the ground ahead, neither trotting nor running nor looking about nor laughing nor stopping to chatter. Her hands must be folded below her cloak while at the same time lifting her dress from the floor while at the same time hiding her mouth if her smile is unattractive or her teeth yellow. A lady must have six hands!”
― Karen Cushman, Catherine, Called Birdy

“Corpus bones, I thought. To be wedded to this perfumed prig with his mouth in a knot and a frown always on his face!”
― Karen Cushman, Catherine, Called Birdy

“19TH DAY OF OCTOBER, Feast of Saint Frideswide, virgin, though why that should make someone a saint I do not know”
― Karen Cushman, Catherine, Called Birdy

“Aviva and I are outgrowing her.”
― Sarah Scheerger, Operation Frog Effect

“It's like learning to ride a unicorn. You never forget.”
― Eoin Colfer, Artemis Fowl

“Butler could kill you a hundred different ways without use of his armoury. Though I'm sure one would be quite sufficient.”
― Eoin Colfer, Artemis Fowl

“Let us proceed under the assumption that the fairy folk do exist, and that I am not a gibbering moron.”
― Eoin Colfer, Artemis Fowl

“I don't like lollipops.”
― Eoin Colfer, Artemis Fowl

“I'm right there with you, darlin'. Unless you step on a landmine, in which case I'm way back in the Operations Room.”
― Eoin Colfer, Artemis Fowl

“I am unarmed. But Butler here, my ...ah...butler, has a Sig Saucer in his shoulder holster, two shrike-throwing knives in his boots, aderringer two-shot up his sleeve, garrotte wire in his watch, and three stun greanades concealed in variouse pockets. Anything else, Butler?”
― Eoin Colfer, Artemis Fowl

“(to Foaly) Captain Short's life is in danger, so push the button before I climb that tower and push it with your face!”
― Eoin Colfer, Artemis Fowl

“Shut up, Julius! I mean, quiet a moment, Commander.”
― Eoin Colfer, Artemis Fowl

“Thankfully the rest of the world assumed that the Irish were crazy, a theory that the Irish themselves did nothing to debunk. They had somehow got it into their heads that each fairy lugged around a pot of gold with him wherever he went. While it was true that LEP had a ransom fund, because of its officers' high-risk occupation, no human had ever taken a chunk of it yet. This didn't stop the Irish population in general from skulking around rainbows, hoping to win the supernatural lottery.”
― Eoin Colfer, Artemis Fowl

“Too much damned TV. Thinks he's Sherlock Holmes."
"That's professor Moriarty," corrected Foaly.
"Holmes, Moriarty, they both look the same with the flesh scorched off their skulls.”
― Eoin Colfer, Artemis Fowl

“My bugs don't have bugs.”
― Eoin Colfer, Artemis Fowl

“Don't worry chief,"said foaly,"It's like riding a unicorn,you never forget.”
― Eoin Colfer, Artemis Fowl

“Artemis said, "I don't like lollipops." It was a woefully inadequate response, and Artemis was instantly appalled with himself. Pathetic really. I don't like lollipops. No self respecting criminal mastermind would be caught dead using the word lollipops. He really would have to put together a database of witty responses for occasions such a this.”
― Eoin Colfer, Artemis Fowl

“These headsets could pick up a spider scratching in Madagascar.” “And is there a spider scratching in Madagascar?” “Well … I don’t know. They can’t really—”
― Eoin Colfer, Artemis Fowl