Bastard > Bastard's Quotes

“Do you hate people?”

“I don't hate them...I just feel better when they're not around.”
― Charles Bukowski, Barfly

“That's the problem with drinking, I thought, as I poured myself a drink. If something bad happens you drink in an attempt to forget; if something good happens you drink in order to celebrate; and if nothing happens you drink to make something happen.”
― Charles Bukowski, Women

“No sympathy for the devil; keep that in mind. Buy the ticket, take the ride...and if it occasionally gets a little heavier than what you had in mind, well...maybe chalk it up to forced consciousness expansion: Tune in, freak out, get beaten.”
― Hunter S. Thompson, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas: A Savage Journey to the Heart of the American Dream

“Life has become immeasurably better since I have been forced to stop taking it seriously.”
― Hunter S. Thompson

“Sometimes you just have to pee in the sink.”
― Charles Bukowski

“Drinking is an emotional thing. It joggles you out of the standardism of everyday life, out of everything being the same. It yanks you out of your body and your mind and throws you against the wall. I have the feeling that drinking is a form of suicide where you're allowed to return to life and begin all over the next day. It's like killing yourself, and then you're reborn. I guess I've lived about ten or fifteen thousand lives now.”
― Charles Bukowski

“Baby," I said, "I'm a genius but nobody knows it but me.”
― Charles Bukowski, Factotum

“I stopped looking for a Dream Girl, I just wanted one that wasn't a nightmare.”
― Charles Bukowski, The Captain is Out to Lunch and the Sailors Have Taken Over the Ship

“To say goodbye is to die a little.”
― Raymond Chandler, The Long Goodbye

“The problem with the world is that the intelligent people are full of doubts, while the stupid ones are full of confidence.”
― Charles Bukowski

“I went to the worst of bars hoping to get killed but all I could do was to get drunk again.”
― Charles Bukowski

“We couldn't imagine the emptiness of a creature who put a razor to her wrists and opened her veins, the emptiness and the calm.”
― Jeffrey Eugenides, The Virgin Suicides

“Not unlike the toaster, I control darkness.”
― Christopher Moore, You Suck

“From 30 feet away she looked like a lot of class. From 10 feet away she looked like something made up to be seen from 30 feet away.”
― Raymond Chandler, The High Window

“The music coming from inside sounded like robots fucking. And complaining about it. In rhythmic monotone. European robots.”
― Christopher Moore, You Suck: A Love Story

“We are here to laugh at the odds and live our lives so well that Death will tremble to take us.”
― Charles Bukowski

“When a hot woman meets a hermit one of them is going to change.”
― Charles Bukowski, What Matters Most is How Well You Walk Through the Fire

“Dead men are heavier than broken hearts.”
― Raymond Chandler, The Big Sleep

“I don't know about other people, but when I wake up in the morning and put my shoes on, I think, Jesus Christ, now what?”
― Charles Bukowski

“I'm a relatively respectable citizen. Multiple felon perhaps, but certainly not dangerous.”
― Hunter S. Thompson

“Life is a bucket of shit with a barbed wire handle.”
― Jim Thompson

“Finally there is nothing here for death to take away.”
― Charles Bukowski, What Matters Most is How Well You Walk Through the Fire

“I don't like jail, they got the wrong kind of bars in there”
― Bukowski C.

“I can never drive my car over a bridge without thinking of suicide.
I can never look at a lake or an ocean without thinking of suicide.”
― Charles Bukowski, The Captain is Out to Lunch and the Sailors Have Taken Over the Ship

“If a violin string could ache, I would be that string.”
― Vladimir Nobokov

“There is no bad whiskey. There are only some whiskeys that aren't as good as others.”
― Raymond Chandler

“There is no trap so deadly as the trap you set for yourself.”
― Raymond Chandler, Long Goodbye

“She gave me a smile I could feel in my hip pocket.”
― Raymond Chandler, Farewell, My Lovely

“It seemed like a nice neighborhood to have bad habits in.”
― Raymond Chandler, The Big Sleep

“The French have a phrase for it. The bastards have a phrase for everything and they are always right. To say goodbye is to die a little.”
― Raymond Chandler, The Long Goodbye