Ana > Ana's Quotes

“Glitter is the herpes of craft supplies.”
― Demetri Martin

“Too bad that all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxicabs and cutting hair.”
― George Burns

“A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.”
― Steve Martin

“You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.”
― Mae West

“Happiness is a warm puppy.”
― Charles M. Schulz

“Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.”
― Robert A. Heinlein

“Ask not what you can do for your country. Ask what’s for lunch.”
― Orson Welles

“If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody come sit next to me.”
― Alice Roosevelt Longworth

“You know what the fellow said – in Italy, for thirty years under the Borgias, they had warfare, terror, murder and bloodshed, but they produced Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci and the Renaissance. In Switzerland, they had brotherly love, they had five hundred years of democracy and peace – and what did that produce? The cuckoo clock.”
― Graham Greene, The Third Man

“Jazz isn't dead. It just smells funny.”
― Frank Zappa

“Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car.”
― Garrison Keillor

“Reality is just a crutch for people who can't handle drugs.”
― Robin Williams

“If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.”
― Mark Twain

“If you lived today as if it were your last, you'd buy up a box of rockets and fire them all off, wouldn't you?”
― Garrison Keillor, Lake Wobegon Days

“The president of the United States has claimed, on more than one occasion, to be in dialogue with God. If he said that he was talking to God through his hairdryer, this would precipitate a national emergency. I fail to see how the addition of a hairdryer makes the claim more ridiculous or offensive.”
― Sam Harris, Letter to a Christian Nation

“Agnostics are just atheists without balls.”
― Stephen Colbert, I Am America

“We were young. We were bored. And the old electroshock therapy machine was just under the stairs in a box next to the Hoover.”
― Augusten Burroughs, Running With Scissors

“If I were to name the three most precious resources of life, I should say books, friends, and nature....”
― John Burroughs

“T.V. has brought murder back into the home where it belongs.”
― Alfred Hitchcock

“I called to wish you an unhappy birthday because you're evil and you lie and if you should die I may feel slightly sad, but I won't cry.”
― Morrissey

“There's more to life than books, you know. But not much more.”
― Morrissey

“Disappointment came to me,
and booted me,
and bruised and hurt me,
but that's how people grow up.”
― Morrissey

“I'd love to...but only with you.”
― Morrissey

“Artists aren't really people. And I'm actually 40 per cent papier mache.”
― Morrissey

“If a girl says not to get her a birthday present that means get me a birthday present and make sure it's jewelry.”
― Kami Garcia, Beautiful Creatures

“Doing nothing gives me great pleasure. And believe me, I succeed wonderfully in it.”
― Morrissey

“Having children makes you no more a parent than having a piano makes you a pianist.”
― Michael Levine

“Champagne for my real friends and real pain for my sham friends.”
― Tom Waits

“There comes a time in every woman's life when the only thing that helps is a glass of champagne.”
― Bette Davis

“Too much of anything is bad, but too much Champagne is just right.”
― F. Scott Fitzgerald